The lady at the front desk looked down at her computer and began typing. "Okay, it looks like there is an opening in the cave room, if that it something you would be interested in. Trust me, it's a very good room!".
"Okay, if you say so. Book me into that room", Derrick said to her. Anything but that minotaur room, he thought to himself. She began typing again, and a few seconds later handed him his room key. An attendent ushered Derrick into the elevator and took him to his new room. Derrick unlocked the door and stepped inside.
It was very dark inside, but Derrick's eyes slowly adjusted. There was a potent musk in the air, like sweaty balls or BO. Derrick looked around and saw that he was inside of what seemed to be a large cave. Derrick walked over to a pile of dirty leaves that looked like a makeshift bed, and sat down. "What have I gotten myself into?!", he thought.
Just then, Derrick heard a loud grunt behind him. Derrick wheeled around and found himself face to face with a very hairy, brutish, muscular caveman! His face was covered in a thick beard, and there was a very bony ridge protruding over his eyes. The caveman furrowed his hairy unibrow and grunted again at Derrick. Derrick backed away slowly. The caveman looked very menacing, and Derrick could see the impressive muscles it had, albeit they were buried under a lot of body hair. Derrick saw that the caveman was only wearing a dirty loincloth, but even with that Derrick could see the impressive bulge in his crotch.
"You new. Cave room." The caveman grunted at Derrick. "Umm, hello. Yes, I am booked for the cave room", Derrick said hesitantly. The caveman nodded, as if he understood. Derrick noticed that the BO smell was coming from the caveman. This close, he could tell that the caveman stunk really bad! Derrick was beginning to rethink his decision. Maybe the minotaur room wasn't that bad in comparison.
"Name Grok. Put on.", The caveman grunted deeply. Grok handed Derrick a furry loincloth made from an animal's pelt. Derrick crinkled his nose; the loincloth was obviously very dirty and smelly, covered in various fluid stains, and a little damp. "Now", Grok grunted aggressively. Derrick gulped and complied. He took off his street clothes and slipped into the loincloth. It was so nasty! Derrick noticed the loincloth was several sizes too big, as well. Just then, the fabric began to heat up against his body...