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CYOTF (Human)

Operation C.O.F.T. (Crazy Old Fart Trap)

added 6 years ago O

"I've got a plan..." Mary Anne said.
"What?" Colin said.
"I REGRET FUCKING YOU, YOU BUTCH BITCH!" a guy's voice screamed. Colin recognized it as Jackson, a springy law student with shiny black hair.
"Oh yeah, sissy boy?! A jackass like you wouldn't be my choice IN A THOUSAND FUCKING YEARS!" his partner Lynn yelled at him.
"That's my que." Mary Anne said as she pulled out a black can.

"You watch the honeymooners Rebecca, I'll deal with these two!" Jack said.
The arguing was reaching a fever pitch, and Jack's attempts to calm it weren't working.
"You two better be fuckin' down there..." Rebecca said as she got under the table, greeted by a face full of Bordero™ brand mace, designed for dealing with bears, wolves, and wild hogs.

The scream his wife let out made Jack turn around, causing him to be hit in the back of the head with a golf club. Larry hit Jack again, this time in the nose, and Lynn grabbed the gun and shot both of Jack's kneecaps out.
"Jack?" the old woman called as her husband screamed.
Mary Anne rushed out and chopped into her legs with a hachet, which Colin recognized as the one he thought he had lost. The woman screamed as Mary Anne continued to strike until her legs were clean off.

"Now!" Mary Anne yelled.
Two of the other guys, Miles and Barry, shoved the old woman in a sack as he husband got his elbows shot out and stuffed in a bag as well. The two bags got tossed into the road in front of a house about 15 feet away.

Colin gazed at the sight with amazement at Mary Anne's cunning, and fear at what she was capable of.
"Buddy boy? The honors?" Larry asked, handing him a grenade launcher.
"Hold on guys, I said cripple them, not kill them!" Mary Anne said with fear.
"Eh, their injuries and starving.... this feels more merciful." Larry said.
"Alright just checking." Mary Anne said.

Colin squeezed the trigger and dove for cover alongside everyone else as the old couple and the house across the street blew up into thousands of flaming fragments, with Miles running by.
"I have got everything loaded into the van and truck, now let's get the Hell out of here!!!!!"
Everyone complied, piling in as chunks of flaming house and old person started falling.
The vehicles drove for miles, stopping ...


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