You are wrought! The fight of those animal instincts and what remains of the human intellect should not cause such anguish. It is a blessing to know those instincts as they are the true lifestyle for animals in a raw world.
Don't fight them, relax let them take your intellect! One need not have both, it would be like sharing one body with two conscience selves.
You are as you said a Connemara stallion, something of rare beauty!
It would be foolish and ignorant to have such a fine specimen put down and killed just because of a lingering human feeling. Forget those feelings, let those human worries slip away and once gone the instinctive patterns of equine life will grant you a peace like heaven itself.
If happy you were when first this form, then having known and rationalized your very change, I believe its a duty to remain alive. You are still a wonder, you live and create life from what ability nature has granted unto those like you. Of anything you have a responsibility to remain alive if only to offer some passive loving and soft relationship to the mares.
Now while you can rationalize for yourself what cherrished feeling you have for those brute animals, those mares! Even if they can not love you as your human wife had done, they still have some inner joy in having you as their protector.
It is you that quells their lusty needs, is it not? It is you that when they come into season you kindness is shown and a stallion is considerate of their feelings.
Do you think for one moment a born stallion would give a second of care what the feelings are of any mare, why no! They are as brutish as the mares they mount and hump. They have no care for them except to help remove their male lust.
No, no I disagree here! I should not put you to death, you should live on the coming many years and grant to those poor brute animals the loving ways only a human mind would dare offer.
You have far more value to everybody than just a sperm count!
Please try to think about what I have said, life is to much a value to toss it aside over a personal feeling. Now take up life, live, and show those around you the most perfect, most loving, most beautiful Connemara stallion the world has yet known!