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The Magic Shop

Four Eyes, Zero Friends

Lyle kisses the ring, and for a moment you think nothing has happened. Then everything goes foggy. You can't see a thing, Lyle is just a blur in front of you. Looks like you have another problem on your hands. It takes you a moment, but you realize you must have switched eyes or eyesight with Lyle. "My eyes... Lyle... I need your glasses please." You grope impotently in front of you. Lyle seems to take a long while to comply, but eventually he places his thick, black-framed glasses in your hand. You put them on, and can see again. A small miracle. You look in the mirror and notice your complexion is the same. You're a little disappointed, you had been hoping that was what Lyle would trade back. But at least you have your penis back. You turn away from Lyle, and pat your groin. Wait. Something is wrong. Your dick should be back to it's normal size, but you barely feel anything when you make contact. Still the same undersized tool. You turn to Lyle, and he's smiling. A smile that makes you very uneasy. And the ring isn't on his finger.

"Lyle," you say carefully, "what did you switch?" He looks much less goofy without his glasses, the glasses you're now stuck with. "You're not a very good friend to Paul." Lyle says. Oh no. You don't like where this is going. "You admitted to me only a few moments ago that you were going to steal from him. I think I will make a much better best friend for him. You're just his roommate now." Before you can do much of anything, Lyle is out the bathroom door. Dumbstruck, you follow. You're trying to keep your voice down. You start to beg. "Please, Lyle, no. This was all an accident. Why are you doing this to me?" Lyle ignores you. He shakes Paul a little. He stirs a little, and speaks. He doesn't seem to react to your changed appearances. Is this a result of Lyle's change to reality? Paul is slurring a little when he finally speaks. "Sorry, Lyle, dude. Must have fallen asleep." Lyle smiles and nods. "It's okay Paul. I should probably go anyways. Call me tomorrow!" Lyle looks ecstatic when Paul pulls him in for an amicable bear hug. He definitely has a thing for Paul, that's plain to see. And now he has a magic ring to help him get anything he wants. Before you can stop him, Lyle is headed out the door. You groan quietly.

Your former best friend doesn't notice your changes, in fact he barely seems to notice your presence. This is all normal to him. You're just his roommate, an okay guy but not really someone he wants to hang out with. Two parts of your brain scream at each other, both confirming and denying this reality. Paul turns to you briefly, a cordially friendly smile on his face. "Hey [name]. Help yourself to some beer if you want. I'm gonna hit the sack. Real tired, dude."

He leaves you standing in the living room, beside your new possessions. Your anime figurines, Guy Fawkes mask, books by physicists and astronomers. You turn to your computer, which you discover is loaded with episodes of My Little Pony, Naruto, and Doctor Who. You know that there's a bunch of tissues and vaseline in the desk too. You're ashamed to feel a stirring in your pale, shrunken penis when you remember that fact. You put your hand to your forehead to massage it. You somehow manage to cause a stinging pain where your fingers make contact with your acne. Some of the pimples that have not risen to the surface of your greasy skin are aching. You cry out weakly, and accidentally knock your glasses to the ground. You look for your glasses blindly and try not to acknowledge the tears welling up in your eyes, only serving to blur your vision further. This is your new life.


What do you do now?


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