Jeremy trudged through the door and was immediately greeted with a loud din. The television was playing at full volume, the twins were fighting about something, their four-year old was crying, and their eldest son was arguing with his mom for what must've been the tenth time today. Jeremy let a deep sigh out, set his briefcase down and got to work. He turned off the t.v., picked up baby Jade and calmed her down, settled the twins' argument, and kissed his wife's cheek hello.
"Alright Michael, what's going on?" he asked his thirteen year old son.
"I asked Mom if I could go to the skate park but she's being totally unreasonable!"
"It's 7:30 Michael, on a Wednesday," Jeremy replied, "And you just failed that math test, you should be studying for the make-up test your teacher so generously offered."
Michael groaned and opened his mouth to complain but a single, tired look from Jeremy shut him down.
"Thanks so much sweetie, he'd been at it all afternoon," his wife Nicole said as she got back to the kitchen.
The Colfer home wasn't small, but it was by no means spacious either. The six of them fit nicely, into the single-story, three bedroom house, but having three small children and one increasingly difficult teen all crammed in the same space made it feel so much smaller.
"Sean, Sammy! Can you boys set the table please?" Nicole called, the seven year olds grumbled and whine but did as they were told. Jeremy kissed Jade on the forehead and set her down on her blanket in the living room floor before grabbing his briefcase again and heading to his room. Once inside, he plopped down on the bed and tossed his brief case aside. He took off his shoes and sighed with relief as he undid his belt and slipped out of his pants. Jeremy got up and made his way to his bureau, but stopped when he caught himself in the mirror. He turned around, a dissatisfied grimace etching itself onto his face. Jeremy stood at a decent 5'10, and while he'd been lucky to avoid baldness, sporting a full head of brown straight hair, he hadn't been so fortunate in the weight department. Though he'd been trim and slim in his youth, the years spent working at his sedentary office job had rewarded him with a plump frame. Sighing, he fished out a pair of sweatpants from a drawer and put them on as Nicole's voice called out, "Dinner's ready!"
Jeremy laid in bed next to Nicole, both exhausted from their long day. Just as Jeremy was dozing off listening to his wife's favorite crime podcast Nicole spoke up. "Oh by the way, baby, a package came in for you today, I left it on the coffee table." A package? Jeremy hadn't ordered anything. A curious man, Jeremy's fatigue washed away and was replaced with intrigue. "Oh, thanks for letting me know Nickie," he said as he got up and went into the living room.
Just as his wife had said, a small, brown box sat on the coffee table surrounded by broken crayons and misplaced toys. Jeremy picked up the box and read the label. It was addressed to him alright, but the white slip lacked a return address or sender. He gave the box a shake and something rattled inside; it sounded like whatever was inside took up most of the space in the box. Curious bu cautious, Jeremy grabbed a knife from the kitchen and cut through the tape. Inside, amid a bed of packing peanuts, sat a strange object. It looked like a cross between a t.v. remote and a gun, with various buttons on the handle under a small screen and a red, metallic orb on the shooting end. Jeremy turned the curious gun in his hands looking for some sort of branding and spotted the words "CYOC LABS" engraved into the underside of the handle in small, plain-looking letters. Jeremy dug through the box in hopes of finding an instruction manual or something to give him more information but found nothing other than pink styrofoam peanuts. Turning his attention to the gun he pressed a gray button on the side of the handle that was larger than the rest. Immediately the screen lit up.
"CYOC LABS RAY GUN," scrolled across the screen, "CONFIGURING..."
"CONFIGURING COMPLETE. SELECT ACTION"
Jeremy started scrolling through the menu using the arrow buttons. He had no idea what he was holding and none of the options seemed to make any sense. "Size? Age? Sex?" Jeremy read aloud in confusion. Scratching his chin, he selects: