The psychologists practice was in an old house near the general hospital. Eileen saw me into the reception area and said she was with Jenna McKenzie who was to see Dr Martin at 10.00 am. She asked how long the appointment would last and was told until 11.30. ‘Mum’ said she would go shopping and would return for me at when I was finished.
Dr Martin turned out to be a very short, middle aged woman. She approached me in the waiting room “Jenna?” I smiled at her “I’m Evelyn Martin. Welcome to my practice, would you come this way” She led me into a spacious office and said “Take a seat” indicating a comfortable looking sofa.
She asked how I was feeling and did I understand why I was there. I explained what I knew and we generally just had a chat about my life, or should I say Jenna’s life. It was difficult as I did not know Jenna’s motivation for breaking and entering. I mentioned I had a job interview tomorrow and that I was horrified by what I had done. She asked had I ever stolen clothes from anywhere else and I admitted I had ‘borrowed’ clothes from my sister for years. She asked me about my sister and I spoke of what a lovely person Sarah was. I was most likely more positive about Sarah than the real Jenna would have been. She discussed jealousy and envy and wondered whether any of this may have been involved in my relationship with my sister. She also questioned me about my relationship with my parents and friends. I answered as Sarah might have answered such questions and wondered whether I was somehow condemning myself. Would she catch me out in a lie?
The conversation moved around to my relationships with boys. I knew Jenna had a reputation for being promiscuous so did not pretend that I was innocent. I had a long history of boyfriends but nothing ever lasted long. She asked had I ever been physically hurt in a relationship. This hit a raw nerve given what had taken place only hours ago and I found myself crying. I admitted that I had been raped and that I had not gone to the police and did not want to talk about it. No my parents did not know about it, only my sister.
Evelyn suggested she get me a coffee and asked how I liked it. She went out of the room and returned shortly afterwards. She said that Maddy the receptionist would bring in some drinks shortly.
While we were waiting she asked about family pets. I admitted that we were never allowed a dog when I was little but that Sarah my sister had a puppy called Biddy. We were chatting about Biddy when Maddy bought in two cups of coffee.
I drank my coffee and felt more composed. Evelyn asked where I saw myself in 5, 10 or 20 years. I could hardly tell her that I saw myself married to Sarah with children. So said I really hadn’t thought too much of what I wanted to do with my life. She mentioned that I should perhaps think of the future because decisions I made now could greatly influence where I ended up.
She said it was time to go and thanked me for having a chat. I was amazed how quickly the 90 minutes had gone. I thanked her and left the room. ‘“Mum’ was outside waiting for me.