Stephen was a typical overweight nerdy unpopular senior in college. A 200 pound, 5’6”, 22-yr old computer science major, the only thing he had going for him was his 3.7 GPA. He couldn’t find a roommate since his freshman year, so he roomed by himself in one of the most cramped dorm rooms on campus (and the fact that it was never picked up didn’t help at all).
On this particular day, Stephen was returning from his evening C++ programming class. It was an easy class, but Stephen went anyway.
Stephen unlocked the door to his room, and pushed it open. Clothes lay strewn everywhere except one place: on his precious, top of the line desktop. Having no social life, Stephen relied on playing computer games to absorb his spare time.
He stepped as carefully as his chubby frame would allow him. One foot ended up in a pizza box, another slipped a touch on a pair of sweatpants. Fortunately, he managed to catch his balance as he made his way toward his computer.
He started the computer. Windows XP started up as usual.
“Well, let’s see if I got any good e-mails. Maybe Mom sent me one,” Stephen stated.
He doubled-clicked on Outlook, and his Inbox happily announced that he did have a new unread message. The Sender: Spam Faerie. The Subject: Forward to your friends!
“I hate these things. But, I don’t have anything better to do. So, why not read it?”
Double-click.
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Dear Sir/Madam:
You have been tagged by the Spam Faerie! Forward this message to at least 10 people. If you don’t, then each spam mail you get that would sell you something to change your body WILL change your body itself, and faster than promised, and with no effort on your part!
Sound great? Just read what happened to these people who refused:
A man from Cali. aged backwards to a fetal state and died!
A woman from Maine lost so much weight that she died from malnutrition!
Be warned!
So, forward this to:
0-9 people – you’ve chosen your curse.
10-49 people – you won’t change from any more e-mails you receive
50-99 people – any changes already done will be reversed
100+ people – you get to choose which e-mails change you and by how much!
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Stephen chuckled.
“I’ve been offered millions of dollars before, but this is a new one! Some people are just nuts.”
Having gotten no other e-mails, Stephen opened his new FPS. It was a great Star Wars game, where you get to play individual people in a battle. He was deep into a level, when he heard his “new e-mail” sound. As usual when he played, he ignored it.
Suddenly he realized something… His shirt was feeling more loose. He looked down… Sure enough, his stomach was smaller than it had been. His pants were also looser around the waist.
“What the? Maybe I should check that e-mail,” Stephen said to the no one that was listening.
He quickly quit and closed his game. He opened his e-mail. Sure enough, there was the subject line:
Lose 30 pounds in 30 days, safely and easily! GUARANTEED!
“Let me check this, just to be sure,” Stephen mused.
He walked over to his closet and pulled out the scale his freshman roommate had bought him. A cruel gift, really. But, Stephen kept it from then on out, just to remind himself of why it was better for him to room alone.
He stepped on.
120… 140… 160… 170… and the scale came to rest. Sure enough, he had lost 30 pounds, exactly.
“Wow… That’s awesome,” said Stephen to himself. “I can’t believe they called this a curse.”
At that point…