William had always regretted never potty training Billy, and apparently, now he had never been weaned, either. The easiest way to resolve that issue would be to make Billy younger. William changed “twelve-year-old” to “one-year-old”. There. Now, he could properly potty train and wean Billy. A baby carrier appeared on the bench next to William.
William rubbed his enormous baby bump thoughtfully. He didn’t want to get rid of the babies he was apparently carrying. But he also didn’t want to be pregnant for very long. He remembered how awful his ex-wife said it was. He generated a new sentence. It read “William will give birth in a month.” A month? William didn’t want to be pregnant for a whole month!
He changed “month” to “minute”, just as Joel returned from the bathroom with Billy. Immense pain wracked William’s body. He let out a scream. Liquid splattered onto the ground from his water breaking.
“William!” Joel shouted, rushing over. William grunted, feeling contraction after contraction hitting him. “Are you- are the babies coming?”
“Yes!” William screamed.
“Oh, no.” Joel quickly placed Billy in the baby carrier, then laid William on the ground. He removed William’s bottoms. “I- I already see a head. Babe, you won’t make it to the hospital in time.” William didn’t respond. Instead, he felt an overwhelming urge to push. And push he did. A baby slid out of William’s vagina and into Joel’s waiting arms.
“Get ready for the next one,” William panted. Joel adjusted his hold on the first baby carefully. William pushed again. The second baby came out and was caught by Joel.
“Oh, wow, they’re beautiful!” Joel whispered. He brought the twin girls over to Billy’s carrier. “Billy, it’s your little sisters! Lea and Lena!”
Still on the floor, panting and in pain, William grabbed the phone and generated a new sentence. It read “William gave birth to twins a minute ago.” He changed “minute” to “week”. Suddenly, he was sitting on the bench next to two baby carriers, while Joel stood nearby with Billy in his baby carrier.
“Ready to go, dear?” Joel asked. “I know it was rough, having the hearing so soon after you gave birth.” William got to his feet and picked up the carriers containing his now week-old daughters.
“Yes, but I’m fine,” he said. He followed Joel out of the building and to a minivan in the parking lot. They buckled in the baby carriers, William got in the passenger seat, and Joel got in the driver’s seat. As they pulled out of the parking lot, William generated a new sentence on the phone.
“William hasn’t lost the baby weight.” There wasn’t a chance to get rid of Joel, but William kind of liked his new boyfriend. He didn’t know much about Joel, but Joel seemed kind and caring. However, William was eager to get his body back to normal. He changed “hasn’t” to “has”. Immediately, he slimmed down significantly.
“I can’t believe you lost the baby weight so fast,” Joel said, shaking his head. “I mean, you didn’t need to. I think you’re sexy no matter what size you are.”
“I wanted to lose it, though,” William said. Joel sighed.
“I know,” he said. William leaned over to kiss Joel’s cheek. Joel smiled at him.
William liked this reality. He was happy with this. Having three young children, a loving boyfriend, and a hot body. This was perfect. William looked down at the phone and, after a moment’s hesitation, deleted the app. Then, while Joel wasn’t looking, he tossed the phone out the window.
He didn’t need it anymore.