The virus' leak wasn't an accident, it was planned from the beginning. This virus was being developed for unknown (likely nefarious) purposes by an as of yet unknown developer. While confirmed viral, it is currently unclear how it spreads, though pattern testing is currently underway. It is called "Dumphox's Syndrome" in professional circles, after the supposed patient zero for the virus, Daphne Dumphox In less than professional circles, however, it's taken on a variety of slang classifications, such as "Wibbly-Wobbly Wench Disease" or "Toonic Bimbofication". The most widely used slang term, of course, takes after a pun of the official name:
Dumbfuck's Syndrome
According to reports, the most consistent symptoms of the virus' infection include a near complete biological reconstruction. Affected subjects' bodies are noted to turn female if subject is not already female. Next, their bodies meta-morph into an cartoonishly distorted, exaggerated hourglass shape, with their waist pinching into the diameter of an American Quarter. Next comes to the inflation of the hips, posterior, and thighs of the subject, followed up immediately with the breasts reaching tremendous size, growing large enough for the engorged nipples to reach mid-thigh. Subjects are also noted to develop conventionally attractive facial features, also to an exaggerated degree. Subject's body will then maintain a tenuous grasp on the laws of nature and physics as though they existed in a decidedly pornographic cartoon. Most notably, the subjects' breasts are known to bounce, swing, jiggle, and wobble around at the slightest movement as if they possess minds of their own. The engorged thighs and hips are also known to jiggle uncontrollably. Subjects's bodies have been noted to display increased resilience, as no known force has been observed to do any damage to one of them. Any recorded injuries have been purely superficial. It is unknown if the infected have any blood to bleed, or in all honesty, if the very concept of 'damage' has any hold on them.
The most intriguing aspect of all changes, however, is the effects of the virus on the cognitive abilities of the infected. By itself, the virus does not cause any direct change in the intelligence of the infected. That is not to say that they are unaffected mentally. The infected are kept in a perpetual stage of increased susceptibility to suggestion. Their minds accept commands and suggestions quite easily, and with drastic effects. As noted during tests with patient zero, Daphne Dumphox, she was told that she was a princess. While the subject knew this to be untrue, her mind absorbed the statement, and her state of dress instantaneously transformed into a regal, frilly ballgown to make the statement true. Subject began referring to herself as a "pretty princess" soon afterwards. In a second test, subject was told that she liked to dance and make her breasts flop around. Though she initially tried to resist, her body began to dance and gyrate in a manner that would induce rampant jiggling. Subject was noted to enjoy the feeling of her assets wobbling wildly around as she danced, and it was impossible for her to believe that she never enjoyed dancing before.
After approximately 10 minutes, the subject's mind had been rendered as soft and malleable as warm cheese. She is now nothing more than a dumb, wobbling bimbo princess, with no signs of whatever intellect she had prior to infection. She has developed an enlarged, drooling tongue, which has been noted across all observed subjects as the "final symptom" of the infected. The development of the tongue is noted as a sign that all intelligence has been lost, leaving behind a horny shell of a former human being. Patient Zero no longer responds to the name "Daphne Dumphox", preferring instead to go by "Princess Dumbfuck" or simply "Dumbfuck." This pattern is consistent across all infected, forgetting their old names and replacing them with silly, demeaning titles. It is noted that other infected refer to her as their leader, although all infected are equally inclined to take orders from any non-infected, including the "Princess".
Soon after, the infected came to be known collectively as "Dumbfucks", after their princess. Non-infected are advised to treat Dumbfucks as though they were obedient servants or living sex toys. Dumbfucks have trouble thinking for themselves, and unless instructed are content to stand around listlessly. If someone you know has become a Dumbfuck, do with them as you please, but do remember to contact the proper CDC officials for examination.