Your head was throbbing. Wherever you were it was cramped and dark. You felt like you've been knocked out for a while. Groaning, you brought your hand up to massage your head, feeling what seems to be a bandanna around your hair. On top of that, your head seemed a bit bigger and rounder than you remember, and your hand seemed like it was missing a finger.
"Urgh... what's going on...," you mumble in a decidedly feminine voice, "Wha? What happened to my voice? Why do I sound like Twilight Sparkle?" Panic set in as you started hyperventilating, "Oh no! I'm trapped in here! HELP! SOMEBODY HELP ME!" You started to struggle out of your small, dark confines, discovering that you were making it rock and teeter around. You continued to cry out for help when suddenly it felt like you were being picked up. You went very still and silent, fear gripping your heart that pounded at a million miles an hour.
There was the sound of a lid popping open above your head as blinding daylight flooded your little space. Then, a big, hairy arm reached in and pulled you out of there. You were set down gently on your feet, your eyes wide with shock. It would appear you'd become a stowaway on a pirate ship, manned by a crew of piratical mascots of all shapes and sizes.
"Are you alright, pretty lady?" you heard a deep voice to your left ask. It belonged to a large gorilla mascot who was dressed like a swarthy swashbuckler. You felt your heart drop into your stomach. You let out a sort of strangled squeal that kinda sounded like a 'yeah' in response.
Suddenly the whole crew erupted into euphoric cheering and celebration. They welcomed you aboard all at once and bombarded you with all manner of questions and such. The chaos was beginning to be a bit much when to your relieved chagrin you heard a thunderous gunshot crack the sky, silencing the scurvy dogs.
"Alright, me hearties! Let's not overwhelm the poor girl," a mature, womanly voice commanded. That voice belonged to the one who fired her pistol to silence the crew. A tall pirate woman dressed all in red, gold, and black whose very presence could sink ships. She was absolutely gorgeous, as far as these cartoony mascots went, with her luxuriously tanned skin and wine red hair. Her head was shaped like a basketball, and she had no nose. She had two big, white circles with purple dot pupils for eyes, and cherry red lips for her mouth. She was shapely and curvaceous with a wasp thin waist, a large lump for a breast, and confident hips. Her biceps were skinny, and her forearms and were thick, like she had Popeye arms. Her legs were thick all the way down, ending in high heeled pirate's boots. She wore the symbol of a crown on the front of her pirate hat, and her confident smile captured the awe of her crew. This... this must be their captain.
W-wait, did she just call you a girl?
The captain strode over to you, lifting your chin with her finger so that you looked up at her. She intimidated you like nothing ever had before.
"Welcome aboard, newbie," she said to you, "I am Pirate Queen Christie, ruler of the Whimsy Seas. What's your name?"
"M-m-m-m-my name is Cabin Girl Molly," you stammer automatically. You notice this and panic. "No! That's not my name! My name is Molly! Huh? Wha... It's Molly! Not Molly, you... It's... I... Oh no! I FORGOT MY REAL NAME!"
"Hey hey, eeeeasy there," Christie soothingly said, stroking your head, "First days are always the hardest for newborns. It's okay. C'mon, follow me to my quarters. I'll explain everything to you in there." You nervously nod as she takes you by the hand and leads you to the captain's quarters. She opens the door, guides you inside gently, and closes the door behind her. She strode over to a chair, sat down, and motioned for you to sit across from her, which you oblige. "Alright, I'm sure you have a ton of questions, so let's hear them. I'll answer as best I can, but I don't make promises that I'll know everything. So! First one. Fire away, matey!"
"Why can't I remember my real name?" you squeaked out first. Christie took a deep breath, sighed, and crossed her legs casually.
"That's because your real name is Cabin Girl Molly," she said, placing her hands in her lap, "You were born just this morning in fact. Happy Birthday by the way."
"What?!" you squeal, "No! No, that can't be possible! I can't be some mascot girl! I'm a human boy, I swear!"
"Okay," Christie massaged her temples, "They really should extract the junk memories before releasing the newborns. I keep telling 'em, but they don't listen. Alright kid, listen. What you're experiencing is just your donor's old memories thinking it got turned into a Whimsy World mascot. Just a bit of identity dysphoria, that's all. Happens all the time."
"Junk memories? Identity dysphoria? Wh-wh-what do you mean?"
"What I mean is you're not some human that maliciously got turned into some kind of slave," the captain explained, "You're a living, breathing mascot with a photocopy of a brain planted inside so that you'd have reasoning and common sense. You know, like a clone? Except you're someone entirely new with an entirely different backstory and memories and such. Don't worry, they'll come to you eventually."
"A-a clone? I'm a clone?" you asked the pirate queen, "How? Why? Why me?"
"Science, because kidnapping goes against park policy, and because you had compatible traits," Christie rattled off, "I'm not the best person to explain all this stuff. You're better off asking the medical team or park administration. So, think you got it?"
"I... I don't know," you mumble, "This is a whole lot to process. Um... what's gonna happen to me?"
"Ah, don't worry about it," the captain assured you, "You're family now, and we take good care of each other. We're all of us alive and sane, okay? We're not robots, we're... okay maybe we're robots but that doesn't explain why we eat... let's try asking some different questions, huh?"
"I... um... okay," you nod nervously, "What do I do now?"
"Look, I know you were born today," she rolled her eyes, "but I know you're not dim. We're Whimsy World mascots! We entertain and delight the guests and make their day special and magical. As pirates, we roam the high seas and the park as a whole in search of adventure, treasure, and all that jazz. We aren't bad guys... but we're pretty often antagonists, if that makes sense. You get it, kid?"
"I... I think so," you nodded, "I do wanna make the guests feel welcome."
"See? You'll be just fine here, Molly," Christie assured you, "Now, got any more questions?"
"Just one," you tilt your head, "Why does your voice sound like Wendie Malick?"