Well, your test to see what it would be like to be an inanimate object did indeed work, though it left you in quite the vulnerable predicament. The feeling of pressure soon subsided, it was still there though as reality changed around you it began to feel more normal. At the very least you wouldn’t be too uncomfortable, but now you were left stuck as a red fire hydrant. You couldn’t move your arms no matter how hard you tried, the only glimmer of hope being that you were still selected, so whenever someone inevitably picked up the device you’d at least swap out of your current position.
For now though you were forced to stare forward, your vision greatly impacted by the swap. Even with your limited view though you could see the fire hydrant-now-dog. The hydrant had grown legs, and it’s top was reformed into a snout. It almost looked like one of those metal art creations, not as horrifying as you may have thought hit it’d look. Though what happened next would be horrifying. The new dog walked over to you and somehow began to sniff you. How it was able to sniff without a nose you’d never know, though it started to reposition itself.
At first you didn’t know what it was doing, though as it raised one of its hind legs the realization of your current situation hit you like a brick, or like a stream of piss headed straight for your new body.
After the dog finished peeing you were left covered in it, as the dog happily trotted away with its owner. “Great.” You think, “cant get much worse than this...”
That’s when.