You scream when thick, black claws bloodlessly burst from your fingertips, and you start banging on the door of the smelly chamber and then scratching at it with your claws. The same thing happens to your feet, and your eyes widen when you see the skin of your arms harden and crack into chainmail-like plates. The plates turn greenish brown, and it looks like you have scales like a lizard. The openings from which you had relieved yourself before teleportation fuse into a single hole at the underside of your body, which feels like a tight, unspeakable twisting feeling. You're too scared to look down at what someone knowledgeable with reptiles would call your new cloaca. You do have to close your eyes as you can suddenly feel something wrong with your face. Your eyes are burning before a slimy feeling starts to overtake them. Your nostrils and jawbone feel pressurized as the vibration of creaking bone rattles up from them throughout your face.
You can tell something's wrong when you open your eyes again. Everything's blurry, and that slimy feeling is still there as if something still covering them. Confused by the feeling that you could still open your eyes again while you think they're already open, you experimentally cause an unfamiliar motion in your eye region that parts the translucent layer horizontally, revealing far crisper vision than you've ever had before! Worryingly, that far crisper vision leaves you staring down a scaly snout toward your clawed hands and the locked door of the chamber. Grabbing your scaly muzzle and exploring it, you surprise yourself by blinking with only your inner eyelids, the ones you can partially see through. You feel and hear yourself let out a high-pitched hiss, which is both a cause and an effect of your burgeoning realization that you have become a reptile, albeit one that can sit upright and use its clawed hands like a human.
Suddenly the swings open, and your sitting pants-less in front of other people--not human people, it seems, but upright two-handed reptiles like yourself. You jump up, startled, and trip over the discarded pants around your ankles, tumbling out of the portypotti like a slapstick comedy victim. Raising yourself up off the metallic floor of wherever you are, you rub your head and blink again, with both sets of eyelids this time. You flinch and stumble backward when one of the creatures starts stepping toward you, hissing, like a 1960s movie monster. "Ph-what'sssss ghghghoing on-ngggg?" you stutter out, having trouble pronouncing English words because it's so easy to slip into hissing or gurgling sounds.
The creature keeps making its own reptile noises, holding up what seems like a flashlight in front of your face, which flickers, mesmerizing you before you gradually begin to understand what the creature is saying.
"Can you understand me now, friend?" it asks, in calm, soothing clicks and hisses that your brain seems to interpret as a message.
"Yeah. Hey, I sound weird. I didn't know you can talk. Is this talking?"
"I just downloaded our language into your brain through the opto-neural tranceiver. You seemed afraid of us. We hoped that you would feel welcome, friend."
"Wh-where am I?" Even in your newly downloaded language, who can blame you for still having something of a stutter, under the circumstances?
"Where else? You are aboard our mothership. We're currently orbiting the third moon of planet Larias 5; our data indicates that you teleported here from Earth, several hundred light years from here, where we happen to have left a few of the many recruitment devices we scatter around the galaxy."
Oh, snap. You've been abducted by aliens.
"Look," you try to explain. "I'm no astronaut. I just stepped in there because I had to 'go'. Then it said something about my DNA and now I look like..."--you gesture to your pants-less reptilian form--"...some kind of lizard thing, whatever the heck it is you are."
"We are Serphenthians," he says, "from the long-vanished planet Serphenth near the edge of the Milky Way galaxy. We are pleased for you to join us on our continuing explorations of space and time."