After the flash happened, I saw myself get up from my desk and chair, which was unusual. Because I looked like that and I wasn’t the one moving. It was one sign something was off.
“Oh my god. Oh my god! It worked! It totally worked! Wow! I’m huge! My voice! Hello, students. I’m Mr. Marty.” I saw my handsome face. Approaching 40. Slightly receding hairline. Dressed in a steel blue-gray suit. Italian good looks with a squarish face and very well-groomed hair. Stubble. Perfectly symmetrical face. Sitcom dad level of handsome. It was me and he was talking to me.
“It’s Martin, and you can call me Mr. Petruccio.”
“You can call ME Mr. Petruccio,” the man smirked. It was then that I realized my voice was that of a little pipsqueak kid.
“My voice. What’s wrong? Who are you? Why are you taller than me?? What’s happening? Am I…in a simulation? Did someone put Oculus on me?”
“No, dude, we totally swapped bodies,” my body said, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
“What do you mean, we swapped bodies? People can’t swap bodies! You’re playing a trick! This has got to be a trick of some kind!”
“I mean kind of, cause I totally stole your body. That’s the trick, man! Now I don’t have to get detention and Dad will never know I had the fight at school! Now, I hope you learned a lesson, young man!” My body said, looking stern.
“Logan? Is that YOU in there? IN MY BODY??”
“Duh! Like, who else would it be? You’re me now! Look!”
Logan indicated the small oval mirror hanging on the wall. Holy crud! I looked like LOGAN! I was Logan?? Oh NO! I was LOGAN! He was one of the biggest problems I’d had this year. Always getting into trouble!
"HOW? How did you do this?"
"I'm a wizard. And I'm a hunk now!" He was completely enraptured with his new face, which happened to be my old face. I was fairly attached to that face and wanted it back!
"A wizard. You're a wizard."
"Well. Wizard in training. You know. Hey, do you have any gum?" he asked, going through MY things in MY desk.
"You were fighting with Randy and now you're taking my body. Well that's just dandy, Mister."
He was always getting into fights with Randy and all his friends. He claimed Randy and his friends were bullying people all the time and he was just standing up to him. He and his best friend Ethan were always starting just as many fights with Randy as he did with them, according to all witnesses it was a merry war between the two groups. They had different circles of friends and as principal it was my job to make sure the students got along.
“Dude. You need to chillax, man. I got this. I can totally be a principal. I’ll be the bestest principal ever. I promise.”
“Bestest is not a word, Logan.”
“Okay, okay. Wow. My voice is super sexy now! I could be an actor in Hollywood or something with this voice. Why didn't you ever do any acting?”
“Because I went into the military instead. I like to be in charge of things. I'm telling you, young man. Whatever I can do to get you in trouble, I will." I crossed my arms and tried to look foreboding.
Instead, Logan just laughed. Cracked up. Loudly.
"Dude, you can't make me do anything. I'm the principal now. Try and send me to detention! All the teachers will totally laugh at you now that you're in MY shrimpy body!"
"This is crazy. We can’t swap bodies. You have no idea how to do my job. And can we get back to why you were fighting with Randy?”
"Um, cuz he's a total bonehead and stuff?" The grown man adjusted the tie and felt the lapels of his expensive new suit. "Cool threads, man!" He checked himself out in the mirror and smiled goofily at his new grownup image, and he felt his new stubble. "Cool!" He felt his face happily. He had a rough, manly face now!
"Focus, kid!"
"Nuh uh. You're the kid. You do it."
"You and Randy have a lot in common, you know."
"No we don't. He's a total a hole and he never liked me. He's always mean to me."
"Well, then maybe we need to make a better effort of making sure you two can be friends. I'm going to assign you to work together."
"Or...I could totally put HIM in detention and take my own side! He can't stop me now and I'm in charge of HIM! Now he CAN'T push me around! I'm like...his boss or somethin'!"
"You cannot put him in detention until I'm sure he actually did something. Who really started this?"
"He did! I was walking down the hallway and he told us that we looked gay and I told him to shut up and he said make me and I said maybe I will!" Logan started swinging his fists in mid air. "He was like, I'm gonna fuck you up and I was like no I'm gonna kick your butt."
"So you were both at fault."
"HOW???"
"Because you went right into fighting mode. Again, you both have a lot in common and you need to both come to the table in peace.
"Or I can be in charge and totally put him in detention. Good idea, Mr. Winkersalamander." Logan winked inside his principal's body. "Now, I'll just send you to my house tonight and you'll pretend to be me and I'll go to your house and pretend to be you! It's easy! You don't live with anyone, right?"
"I'm divorced," I admitted. "And I demand we switch back. What if something happens to us in these bodies? What if we get trapped like this"
“Come ON!” Logan whined. “Pleeeeeeease? It’s only for a little while! You just have to pretend to be me for a few days at most!”
“This is sheer lunacy. I cannot believe that all this is real, but it’s happening. So you’re a wizard or something.”
“Kinda,” Logan looked nervous. “I mean, my dad is and I’m totally learning and all. But like, I have to go to a real school because wizard school is super expensive and like, he can’t afford it right now because he and mom are buying this ski chalet and…”
“Logan! Your dad knows magic, too?”
“Please don’t tell him! I just need this body for a few days!”
“Why?? What could possibly be the point of this? And I want to talk to your father! You and Randy need to settle things between the two of you.”
“I can do that after, ya know. I do my thing.”
“What thing??”