As Chad stood there puffing out his chest, not only was his chest getting hairier, it was also getting broader along with his shoulders and thighs, a couple of dodecahedral dice rolled in the dust in front of him. He leaned forward not realized that his upper body mass had increased by 50 percent. He stumbled forward. His more muscular thighs and calves helped him to catch himself from falling. But then he stepped on one of the dice, and was hopping up and down on one foot.
Another voice broke out in hysterical laughter. Still hopping on one foot, as he pulled the dodecahedral die from where it had embedded itself in the sole of his foot, and turned hopping to face the laughter.
"What the hell is going on?" Chad shouted.
"Well, Barbarian, you recall Wizard's Chess from Harry Potter?"
"Yeah, but what does that have to do with turning me into a muscle bound freak?" Chad said staring down at his caricature of a bodybuilder barbarian.
"Well, you're going to be my barbarian in Wizard's Dungeons and Dragons, of course," said the voice from the shadows.
"You've got to be kidding?" Chad said massaging his sore foot.
In a stern voice, the shadowy figure said, "No, I am not kidding. You're my Barbarian now. Read the bottom of your foot, Barbarian."
Chad twisted his foot to see the bottom of his sole. Instead of an inflamed sole from stepping on the pointy 20 sided die, he saw his uninjured sole was tattooed. Incredulously, he read it, ""Property of..." Oh, you've got to be kidding."
He looked up as the figure emerged from the shadows. The grinning face matched the name now tattooed on his foot. He put his foot down. It no longer hurt, and he took two strides toward the one whose name was written on his sole.
The wizard raised his hand, and said, "Stop!"
Chad froze in midstride.
"Wait, why can't I move?"
"You can't move, Barbarian, because I told you to stop. Remember I own you now. You cannot harm me, and you must obey me."
"Seriously?"
"Seriously."
"Why me?"
"Well, I need a Barbarian that is a champion, clever, agile and athletic. You have all those qualities. I considered Rick too, but Rick the Barbarian doesn't have the same ring to it as Chad the Barbarian, does it?"
"Uh, wait. If it's about the name, why don't you use that Conan guy. Uh, you know the science wiz?"
Again hysterical laughter ensued. Then the wizard said, "...