The next few days seemed to crawl by. Nate kept expecting his Chronivac to enact some sort of change, but after his teeth it seemed in no hurry to shift him any more.
This was already a little freaky. All of Nate’s pictures had been updated to reflect his new buck toothed grin. Even pictures of his dad now gave him some hint of where his bad teeth genes may have come from.
He had set the Chronivac on autonomous though, so there wasn’t much he could do other than stick to his usual routine. Work at the office, cooking at home, TV in the evenings, and then hitting the bed early.
On the third day of wearing his Chronivac, Nate woke up and immediately noticed something was off. His bed felt familiar, but the room was too small. Not only that- What the? The view was all wrong!
He got out of bed, running over to his window. It looked like he was on the fourth story of some building? This wasn’t a high rise… He recognized this part of town. It had run down car dealerships, some noisy factories, and a couple of run down parks.
Nate walked out of his bedroom, taking in the rest of his… apartment?
“What the hell…?” He stared. Then he remembered the Chronivac.
There was one notification on his watch. “Personal Background Modified: Affluence Decreased.”
Nate looked down in disbelief. “Huh?” He reached for his wallet. It felt lighter than before. One of his credit cards was missing, and he only had four dollars sitting in his wallet. Even its leather had been downgraded to pleather.
“What the hell did you do Owen!?” Nate felt his hackles rise, “You were supposed to make me a donkey! Not steal all my money!”
He shook his wrist, trying to get a response out of the device. It refused to say or show anything other than the clock no matter how many times he poked it. Finally Nate smacked it across the top out of frustration.
There was another buzz on his wrist.
“Possession Deleted: Car.”
A bus pass appeared in Nate’s wallet.
“Shit…! Sorry! I didn’t mean it. Come on, give me my car back Owen!” He huffed. “Sir!”
It was no use. After a few minutes Nate had to give up and get ready for work. He realized he only owned five nice work shirts now. He must wear them on rotation.
At work, Nate discretely pulled up his bank website and checked on his personal finances. He still had his nice accounting job down at the paper company, but his savings had completely vanished. He had apparently made some very poor choices with high interest loans in the past. Nearly his entire paycheck was being poured into his student loans and rent.
What the hell was Owen getting at!? Nate didn’t get any other changes for the next few days. He had throughly familiarized himself with the dollar menu when his next notification finally popped up.
“Attribute Modified: Intelligence Decreased.”
Nate stared at his watch. He dropped his burger, immediately starting to feel light headed.
“What the…?” Nate felt his usually sharp focus dull. Semesters worth of college classes were leaking out of his head like beach sand through his fingers.
“Owen, hey…” He made sure not to hit the watch this time. “Come on, what are you doing?”
Amortization algorithms completely faded from memory. Depreciation schedules, profit and loss statements, the tools of his trade were all disappearing from his mind. He was starting to forget what he had even forgotten.
“Sir I’m an accountant!” He stood up in his empty apartment. “I need that!”
His watch buzzed again, “Education Updated: Some High School.”
“Oh fuck oh fuck…!” Nate held his head. He wasn’t just forgetting his college courses. His train of thought was getting slower.
Buzz buzz, “New Skill Added: Resume Forging.”
“What does this have to do with donkeys!?” Nate tried to hold onto at least some bit of his math skills. His hands started shaking as he got a pencil and paper out. Nate tried his best to do the most complicated math he knew. He felt a lump in his throat form as he slowly managed to add two three digit numbers together. He would have snapped the pencil if he had a spare. He was an accountant who needed a calculator for basic arithmetic.
When he got ready for work the next morning, he saw a pair of dull eyes staring back at him in the mirror. That spark he had entering the workforce just seemed completely gone. His personal hygiene seemed to have taken a hit too. Nate could hardly be bothered to comb his hair before heading out.
Now he was in an office with no idea how to do his job, or even really what an accountant was supposed to do. His computer was a mishmash of spreadsheets he had copied from his coworkers, links to basic Excel tutorials, and a laundry list of overdo assignments.
Just before lunch, Nate heard someone clearing their throat behind him. It happened a second time, and he remembered that was a sign people gave when they were trying to get someone’s attention.
“Nate, can I see you in my office?” Nate’s boss looked down at him with a mixture of disappointment and pity.
“Sure thing sir.” Nate nodded, not quite picking up on the expression.
He meekly followed his boss into his well furnished office. Almost immediately after sitting down, his boss threw over several spreadsheet printouts.
“Nate, you’ve been copying all of Sarah’s work.” His boss sighed.
Nate started to speak up. Before he could though, another paper dropped onto the table.
“We finally got your transcript by the way. Your real transcript.” He sighed.
Nate recognized the letter head from his high school. “Sir, I can explain.”
Could he? The honest truth was that a computer on his wrist was altering reality in some misguided attempt to get him off. That probably wasn’t going to fly.
“I- Look, I really need this job.” Nate felt his eyes starting to well up. He had worked really hard to advance his career here! The Chronivac could fix this later, right?
“I know you do.” His boss sighed, “Look, you’re a nice guy Nate. I wish you had just been a bit more honest with us.”
Nick’s wrist buzzed.
His boss sat up, “We’re a big company though, and I still think you might have a place here.” He cleared the papers away, pulling out a new form, “Have you ever thought of joining our donkeys?”
Nate’s eyes went wide. He looked down at his watch.
“Reality Update: Paper Corp’s manual labor is performed by low-skill donkey men.”
“Nate…?” His boss asked softly.
Nate jerked his head up. “I- Sir?”
“Look, I know it’s not the career path you probably intended, but our donkeys are well looked after!” His boss slid the form forward, “Three years as one and you should have more than enough savings to go back to school.”
Nate was confused. “I’m sorry, are you trying to hire me to be a janitor?”
Now it was his boss’s turn to look confused, “I suppose? Our company replaced most of our office support staff and warehouse employees with donkeys years ago.” He slid the piece of paper forward. “I’m trying to throw you a lifeline here Nate.”
Nate looked down at the paper. It was an employment contract for a three year tenure as an anthropomorphic donkey. In Nate’s world there was now something even lower than the most menial job. The hair on the back of his neck stood up at the conspicuous use of the number three. Was Owen trying to hint at how long he might actually stay like this?
“This… isn’t really what I had in mind.” He rubbed his watch anxiously. He had rent to make! The Chronivac had boxed him into a corner…! It had only been a week and Nate already just wanted his life back.
The watch buzzed again.
“Reality Update: Donkey men are the property of their employers.”
Nate looked up. The document in front of him was shifting. The words were starting to push the bounds of the legal system, and Nate couldn’t understand what they meant. He could guess though.
“Sir… If I sign this, does that mean Paper Corp owns me?” Nate gulped.
His boss cleared his throat, “Just in a legal sense. Donkeys aren’t strictly people.” He pushed the paper forward a bit, “Nate, they only do a career fair for these roles once a year. I had to call in a favor for them to consider you.” He set a pen down, “If you don’t sign this contract, I’ve been asked to escort you outside of the building.”