Jehovah stroked His golden beard thoughtfully. He'd overheard Michael's offhand remark about Jove's concubines. Did Michael really think so little of Him as to assume He would personally send someone into Jove's awful harem? Jehovah had long wished that Jove would give up this sinful behavior, but all he seemed to do was collect more.
Jehovah had tried to discipline Jove before, but his second son had always found a way to talk his way out of serious penalty. The only time he had failed was when Jove stirred up his Roman worshipers to murder the early Christians out of jealousy toward Jesus. That had gotten Jove stripped of his post as Lord Chancellor, which was eventually replaced with Lord Gatekeeper. Maybe it was time for Jehovah to put his foot down in regards to harems.
Jehovah found Jove drinking wine with his wife Juno. Jehovah felt deeply sorry for Juno. The poor angel had never been comfortable with her husband's extensive harem. Jehovah cleared his throat.
"Ah, hello Father," said Jove.
"Jove, we need to talk," Jehovah said.
"About what?" Jove asked, recognizing this tone of voice and not liking it one bit.
"It's about that harem you keep," Jehovah said. "How big is is, again?"
"Nine slave-wives and three slave-husbands," Juno said with a frown, answering for her husband. "The slave-wives are Metis, Callisto, Europa, Antiope, Danaë, Io, Aegina, Alcmene, and Leda, and the slave-husbands are Ganymede, Aquarius, and Adonis. Yes Jove, I keep track."
"Well, the size isn't even the main point," Jehovah said. "Even one concubine is too many. It is unholy to force a human to serve your pleasure. I've looked the other way for a long time, but I'm sick of it. People are beginning to think that I approve of your slave-taking ways, son!"
"I'm not the only one!" Jove protested. "Kushiel keeps slave-wives!"
"And that is no better," Jehovah answered, crossing his arms. "I intend to pass a law forbidding the taking or keeping of slave-spouses. And as your father, I demand you to free yours immediately to set an example."
"You... WHAT??!!!" Jove screamed, tearing at his golden hair. "WHAT THE FUCK?! THIS IS BULLSHIT!!!"
Juno was laughing delightedly at her husband's misfortune. "Oh, this is just too rich! This is delightful!"
"I'm glad you think so, Juno," Jehovah smiled. "This could be the start of a brilliant new chapter for Heaven, a chance to fully live up to the promise of this place." He then turned to Jove. "And don't think that being stubborn will work on me. If you won't free your slave-spouses, the royal guard WILL."
Jove stormed angrily out of the room.
****************************************************
Jove sat in a garden next door to the closed-down Grand Library, pensively stroking his golden goatee. How could his father do this! He DESERVED all of those concubines! He was Prince Jove, Caelestis, secondborn son of God! Any manor or woman he wanted should be his!
"Is something bothering you?" asked a familiar voice.
Jove turned to see Semyaza. "Father has ordered me to free my harem," Jove answered. "He's going to force all other angels to do the same."
"Such foolishness," Semyaza whispered. "We ought to put a stop to this. It would be so much better for Heaven if you were God, Jove."
"Me, you say?" Jove smiled smugly. "Yeah I can see that. But how the fuck will I become God?"
"The Inquisition will help you," said Semyaza whispered. "Kushiel wishes me to make him the new God, but I think I'd prefer to bow down to YOU, Jove, Caelestis."
"I certainly wouldn't mind," Jove whispered. "But you didn't hear that from me."
"This conversation never happened," Semyaza nodded.