After entering my room and contemplating for a moment I decide to accept my new body as ‘me’ and try to adjust. These past few hours I have been trying to put a barrier between my new body and who I am, but Mariah is right that from now on this body is mine; so instead of being in denial, the healthy thing should be to make this body part of my identity and adapt to my new life.
With some trepidation I decide to explore my body, and stand in front of the full length mirror.
The first thing I notice is my face; I didn’t notice before because of the nervousness before the swap, but she - I mean - I am quite pretty. Button nose, a delicate small chin, some baby fat on my cheeks, big expressive blue eyes, thin eyebrows and long eyelashes.
As I previously noticed I have straight black hair, not dark brown but a very pretty pitch black hue, and turning around I see that it goes to the small of my back. Running my fingers through my hair makes me notice how silky and well taken care of my hair is.
Opening my mouth I see white straight teeth and I am relieved that I would not need to use braces again. When I was younger I had to use them for a few years and it was quite annoying. Thoughtlessly I pass my pink tongue through my teeth and think how strange that just yesterday these belonged to another person.
Suddenly a silly idea occurs to me, and I try to touch the tip of my nose with my tongue…
“Yes!” I said, I could do it. this was something that I couldn’t do in my previous body. Sticking my tongue out, I see that my new tongue is a bit longer than my previous one and grin a little while resuming my observations
Inspecting my skin I see that it’s color is white with cool undertones and tracing the palm of my hands along my arms I see that it is very smooth as well. It looks nice but I fear that during sunny days I would need to use sunscreen to not get sunburns. Parting my hair and inspecting my ears I see that they are already pierced, a small almost invisible hole in each one. It does not look recent so probably her parents did it when she was a baby. Smiling to myself, I remember that recently I have been considering getting some piercings. I am a little happy that I can try some now without the pain of opening a new hole.
Finally after gathering some courage I strip my clothes before I can second guess myself.
Immediately my gaze goes to my chest
“Small” I unconsciously mutter.
This is definitely the chest of a prepubescent girl with tiny pink areolas and minuscule nipples. I gently touch and knead the nipple area, but I cannot feel any lumps not fatty tissue ‘flat as a pancake is an apt description’.
This makes me relieved that I don’t have to carry around a pair of breasts yet, but it also makes me feel a bit dissatisfied with how underdeveloped I am; also, I feel a bit of fear and longing for the future.
This weird mix of emotions makes me wonder if my teenage boy’s mind is synchronizing with my little girl’s body. Would my feelings keep shifting to more girly emotions as time goes on? Oddly, this doesn’t disturb me.
‘I am who I am’ I think
Only up until now I have been male; now I can find what a female me is like
With my feelings sorted, I restart my exploration.
As I check my body, I see narrow shoulders and a small back, and thin arms that end in delicate hands. The palms are soft and the nails are not longer than the fingertip and not painted, but it seems that some of the nails are a bit chewed off. ‘If I also picked Hailey’s habits, I would need to make an effort to break them’ I think to myself.
Suddenly, my gaze stops to the sides of my torso because I see my ribs faintly sticking out. Touching the contour of my ribs and my very flat stomach, my mind goes back to the brunch and to how little I ate; it occurs to me that Hailey might have had a small appetite and that made her body a bit underweight.
Slowly turn around in front of the mirror and see my flat butt, scrawny legs and small feet. I playfully slap my ass, but as I expected there is not enough mass to jiggle; what surprised me however, is the sharper than normal pain that I felt when slapped my sensitive skin.
Now, gazing at my crotch, I decided that it’s the proper time to check the new part of my anatomy that biologically defines me as a female. Sitting down in front of the mirror and opening my legs I stare at my hairless vulva. With trepidation but also curiosity I opened my vagina to inspect in detail my new genitalia like my sister did, but I soon discovered that rough movements or putting my fingers too deep causes me pain.
With more care this time, I renewed my examination and shortly found out that compared to my sister’s pussy my outer labia seems more… closed and almost nothing of the internal parts show outside, it looks like a slit. When I open it, I notice that the inner lips are more skinny than Mariah’s and the colors a lighter shade of pink.
With care, I check the narrow vaginal opening and think to myself how difficult it would be to put anything in there right now. Imagining the size of my old boy's penis and remembering the pain that I felt putting my fingers in too deep I shudder a little.
Taking my fingers out for a moment I notice that the interior of my vagina is a little bit damp; taking into account that I am not horny, I conclude that is the way vaginas normally are.
Locating my urethra is easy and I take a moment to observe the hole from where my pee comes out. Finding my hood and clitoris was, in turn, more difficult and after I spotted them, I discovered that the reason was that they are smaller than what I was expecting from my sister’s show.
After ending my inner exploration, I stay sitting down for a moment while looking at my abdomen and I contemplate about my new organs that I cannot see.
'I have ovaries that very soon will start pumping tons estrogen through my body, initiating my puberty and making my breast grow'
'I have a uterus...' That thought suddenly led to the chilling realization that in the future I would be capable of getting pregnant, but amid the fear there is a hint of curiosity and expectation; ‘has my brain started to shift my mind about how to feel about maternity?’ I ruminate
After exiting from my trance I stand up and decide to….