Jesse walked alongside Sam toward the cafeteria, Sam babbling on about some trivial story involving a teacher Jesse couldn’t care less about. His mind wandered, thinking back on how he’d managed to survive half the day pretending to be someone he wasn’t, and how he still had another half to go. Normally, lunch would be a reprieve, a time to relax. But not today. Today, it was just another obstacle. He’d have to sit with his cheer friends and keep up the act, forced to blend in with a table full of boys who weren’t anything like him. What he really wanted was to sit alone, to get a moment of peace and quiet, but that would only raise suspicion. And truthfully, the thought of being left alone with his thoughts was worse.
As they entered the cafeteria, the noise of hundreds of students talking, laughing, and moving about filled the space. Jesse and Sam moved through the lunch line, grabbing trays. Jesse absentmindedly picked up some Asian noodles with vegetables and meat, copying whatever Sam was getting without much thought. His mind was too distracted to care about what he ate. They made their way through the crowded tables, Jesse feeling the weight of his exhaustion grow with each step. Keeping up appearances was draining. All morning, he’d been forcing smiles, making small talk, and pretending to be someone he wasn’t. Now, he had to keep that up through lunch too.
As they made their way to their cheer table, Jesse’s eyes spotted Emily sitting at one of the far-off tables. He was seated on the far end, next to another nerdy looking boy with messy purple and blue-dyed hair. The two of them were talking quietly, isolated from the larger crowd at the table, clearly not part of the popular group. Jesse felt a strange pull, a sense of familiarity and comfort. Sitting with them, talking about video games... it felt more real than pretending to care about makeup and cheer routines.
“Hey, uh, I’ll catch up with you.” Jesse blurted out, stopping mid-step.
Sam shot him a confused look. "What? Why?"
"I just need to check on something." Jesse responded, already turning away.
Sam shrugged, clearly weirded out but not pressing the issue. “Uh… okay?” he muttered before heading to their usual table.
Jesse took a deep breath, gathering his courage as he approached Emily and his friend. His heart raced, knowing the "Jess" from this world probably wasn’t the kind of boy who’d sit with these two. But he didn’t care. He needed to break away from the plastic cheerleading persona he was expected to maintain.
“Hey.” Jesse started, trying to sound casual as he reached their table. “Mind if I sit with you guys?”
Both boys froze, their conversation abruptly cut off. Emily looked up first, his face immediately hardening into a scowl, suspicion darkening his eyes. The boy with the dyed hair, however, was less restrained.
“Go away Jess.” he spat, glaring at Jesse with clear disdain. “We don’t want you here.”
Jesse flinched, realizing how deeply the “Jess” in this world must have treated these two. Crap. Of course, Jess would’ve bullied them. He hesitated but then put his tray down anyway, ignoring the icy stares.
“Look, I just... need a break.” Jesse said, trying to keep his voice calm despite the tension. “I’m stressed out, okay? I don’t feel like dealing with the cheer group right now.”
The boy with the dyed hair scoffed, crossing his arms. “Oh, poor you. It must be so hard being a pretty cheerleader. What, did you break a nail?”
Jesse winced at the snide remark but held his ground. “I’m serious. I know I haven’t exactly been... nice to you guys, but I’m trying to be better.”
Emily narrowed his eyes, clearly not buying it. “Yeah, right. What’s your angle, Jess? You’re suddenly acting all friendly? What are you trying to pull?”
“I’m not trying to pull anything.” Jesse replied, forcing himself to meet Emily’s gaze. “I’m just… sorry. For whatever I did. I’m not that boy anymore.”
A tense silence fell over the table. The boy with the dyed hair looked ready to argue, but Emily raised a hand, signaling him to hold back. His expression softened ever so slightly, though the suspicion in his eyes lingered. “You really expect us to believe you’ve changed?”
Jesse nodded, taking a deep breath. “I don’t know if you’ll believe me, but I’m trying. I just need a break from all the fake cheerleader crap. Can I sit with you guys? Please.”
The boy with the dyed hair shook his head, clearly still against the idea, but Emily seemed to consider it. After a long pause, he sighed. “Fine. You can sit. But don’t think this means we’re friends.”
Relief washed over Jesse, and he sat down quickly, grateful for even the smallest concession. “Thanks.”
As soon as he sat down, Emily and his friend resumed their conversation, practically ignoring Jesse’s presence. They were talking about video games—titles Jesse recognized from his old life. Emily had turned his back slightly, signaling Jesse wasn’t really welcome in their discussion, but that was fine. Jesse was content just to sit at a table where no one was obsessing over makeup or cheerleading.
After a few minutes, Emily glanced back at Jesse, his expression still guarded but less hostile. “So, Jess.” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “What games are you into, huh?”
Jesse knew this was a trap. The old “Jess” probably didn’t know a thing about gaming, but he did. Jesse took a deep breath and let his real self shine through, listing off the games he’d loved from his old life. “Well, I’ve always been into first-person shooters. You know, like Call of Duty, Halo, Overwatch. Been getting into Apex Legends recently, too.”
Emily blinked, visibly surprised. He glanced at his friend, who was equally stunned. Neither of them had expected that answer.
“You actually play Overwatch?” Emily asked, his voice softening just a little. The suspicion was still there, but now it was mixed with genuine surprise.
“Yeah.” Jesse said, nodding. “I’ve been playing for a while. I’m not great, but I’m getting better. My favorite’s probably Soldier 76. I like his… uh, her kit.” he corrected himself, quickly catching the pronoun difference. “And the whole tactical shooter vibe.”
Emily leaned back, his posture relaxing slightly. For the first time, he didn’t look like he was waiting for Jesse to say something cruel or make fun of them. Instead, there was a flicker of curiosity in his eyes.
“Okay.” Emily said, still guarded but less harsh. “Maybe you do play. But don’t think this means I trust you. One wrong move, and we’re done.”
Jesse nodded, understanding the fragile truce they’d established. “Fair enough.”
Emily's friend remained skeptical, his arms crossed and his glare unwavering, but Jesse didn’t mind. He had made progress, however small. It was the first step away from the shallow persona this world had forced on him, and that was enough for now.
Eventually, Sam approached their table, his steps quick and his expression tight. Without so much as a greeting, Sam poked Jesse on the shoulder, a mixture of impatience and confusion on his face.
“Hey, can I talk to you?” Sam asked, his voice edged with urgency as he tugged at Jesse’s arm, urging him to step away. Jesse sighed but complied, rising from the table and following Sam a few paces away from Emily and his friend.
“What the hell are you doing sitting with those losers?” Sam asked, loud enough for anyone nearby to hear. He didn’t bother to lower his voice, almost as if he wanted Emily and his friend to hear the insult. Then, in a more hushed tone, Sam added, “Look, I know you’re having a hard time remembering everything since… whatever’s going on with you. But trust me, you do not want to be seen with these two.”
Jesse’s eyes flicked back to the table, catching a glimpse of Emily’s face. There was a brief flash of sadness in Emily’s eyes, but it was quickly masked with resignation. He’d heard it all before—probably from "Jess" and the others countless times.
Jesse let out a slow breath, turning back to Sam with a forced calmness. “It’s just for today, okay? Relax.”
Without waiting for Sam’s response, Jesse turned and walked back to the table, reclaiming his seat. Sam stood there, visibly agitated, fidgeting as if he wanted to argue. But after a moment of indecision, he threw up his hands and walked away.
Jesse exhaled slowly, feeling the tension settle around them like a heavy fog. Emily and his friend were both quiet, and Jesse could feel their discomfort. He poked at his food, his thoughts drifting back to what the old “Jess” and the other cheerleaders must have put these two through. How many times had they been called losers? How many times had "Jess" hurt them?
“I, uh… I know I’ve been a jerk before.” Jesse began awkwardly, still unsure how to navigate the mess Jess had made. “I’m sorry for all the stuff I’ve done to you guys. I know it doesn’t mean much, but—"
“It’s fine.” Emily cut him off, his tone dismissive. It was clear from the tightness in his voice that he wasn’t really interested in accepting the apology, but he also didn’t want to engage further. He pushed his food around on his tray, avoiding Jesse’s eyes.
Jesse bit his lip, feeling the weight of the moment. The tension hung in the air as they ate in silence, the clatter of the cafeteria around them a stark contrast to the heavy atmosphere at their table. Jesse felt the stares of other students, but he tried to ignore them, focusing instead on his food. After a while, Emily broke the silence by asking Jesse more about Overwatch, still skeptical but intrigued by Jesse’s knowledge of the game. Slowly, the conversation picked up again, revolving around strategies and favorite characters. Emily’s friend, though still guarded, joined in occasionally, though his tone remained cautious.
The lunch period eventually came to an end, the bell ringing loudly above them. Jesse stood up and grabbed his empty tray, glancing back at Emily and his friend. “Thanks.” he said, the words leaving his mouth with surprising sincerity.
Emily looked up, puzzled. “What for?”
“For letting me sit with you.” Jesse replied. He didn’t bother explaining how peaceful it had felt to talk about video games instead of makeup, cheer routines, or fashion. He wasn’t sure they’d understand anyway.
Emily shrugged, still wary. “Uh, no problem?” His eyes narrowed slightly, as if waiting for the punchline, like Jesse had been setting up some elaborate, cruel joke that hadn’t reached its climax.
Jesse smiled, trying to come across as friendly. “See you around, Emily. Later, uh…” He trailed off, realizing he still wasn’t sure of the dyed-hair boy’s name.
“Sarah.” the boy muttered, still not fully convinced of Jesse’s intentions.
“Right. Later, Sarah.” Jesse gave them a small wave and walked off, his steps lighter than before. A strange sense of accomplishment settled over him. He didn’t know if he’d earned their trust, but it felt like a step in the right direction. For the first time since everything had turned upside-down, Jesse felt like he was beginning to find his place in this strange new reality.