Susan opened the door and saw her husband, David, standing there.
However, something was different. Susan felt her mind shift slightly. Her eyes wandered to his ring finger - instead of the usual gold wedding band, there was simply a tan line, a telltale sign of any recent divorcee.
“Hey, Susan. You know, you could have told me you were changing the locks. I would’ve had my stuff out earlier.” He said, a bit glumly.
Susan snapped back in to reality. That’s right, she and David had just recently gotten a divorce. David was a regional manager for a car dealership chain, but he came from a lot of money. Combined with Susan’s law experience, she easily worked out a good prenup, and the two simply signed it after twenty years of marriage, granting Susan the house and all her assets and David a good deal with no alimony. Why had they gotten divorced, again, though? Susan couldn’t quite remember.
“Hey, Susan… you okay? You’re kind of blocking the door. Listen, I’m sorry for freaking out about the locks, I just need the rest of my stuff. I’ll have it out tonight. I won’t come back again unannounced, I swear.” He said.
Susan snapped out of it.
“Oh, sorry, Hon. Go ahead.” She said sweetly. However, as if she were on autopilot, she said found herself saying something in a distinctly less sweet voice. “Just don’t go rifling through my shit, alright? Fuck.”
Susan felt shocked. She’d always been proper and respectful, but David interrupting her masturbation session had… had pissed her off!
“I’ll be in and out.” David said.
“You fuckin’ better be! And how God damned hard is it to call first?” Susan finished. However, she felt herself calm back down.
“Ugh. Whatever. Just… call next time, alright?” Susan said.
“Sure thing. And I won’t touch your… stuff.” David said, calmly, as if he were used to her acting like this.
Susan wracked her brain trying to figure out why they got divorced…