"The Staff of Swapping can be found in a tower in the woods next to the town. Unfortunately it's in the possession of an insane Wizard who uses the staff to steal the equipment of would-be adventurers and attached them to himself! Last I heard he had over 100 sexual organs attached to his body. If you're not careful," the Wizard says as he points at Brian, "you could go from having three members and three sacks to having none at all."
Mike, Joe, Brian and Christine all nod as they leave the Wizard's house.