As you browse the morning paper, you notice a very strange ad. It reads: "NewYou Industries, Become The Person You Always Wanted To Be."
It goes on to talk about how the "scientists" are able to alter reality to give you any body and lifestyle you desire. The world around you will think you've always been the person they turn you into, it's claimed. They then place you into a "Brain Alternation Machine" which they say will guarantee satisfaction with your new life.
Because you aren't a moron, you realize that such things can't possibly be real, but decide to head down to the address given for a good laugh. After all, you don't mind being the butt of a joke as long as it's a funny one.
You enter the lobby of the building, and are greeted by a friendly receptionist. You ask for information about the advertised procedure, and rather than getting the giggle you expected, you are given several legal forms to sign, as well as an "identity request" sheet.
There doesn't seem to be anything interesting in the legal forms, except for a warning that after you are given your new life, your memories of yourself before the change will fade slowly, and be replaced with more appropriate ones, and possibly an entirely new personality if applicable.
You are almost certain this is some kind of a gag, as if the above were true, you wouldn't remember the company to actually take legal action. So you decide to fill out the forms. You decide on the identity request sheet to become...