As you stare at the pile of scattered straw, in the midst stands a six foot tall muscled pig headed man-literally pig headed with snout and all.
"You're the little pig who lives in the straw house?" you gasp looking up at the monster pig man.
"Yeah? At least I used to live in a straw house, until you blew it down!" he snarls.
"But you're so big! I thought you were little? As in 3 little pigs?" you answer in confusion.
"It's okay to blow down people's houses smaller than you?" he asks angrily, and adds, "Yeah, me and my two brothers were the three runts of litter, our thirteen brothers and sisters are all seven feet tall, what of it?"
"Nothing, no offense meant. It's just that the Big Bad Wolf said--"
"What did my no-good big brother's ex-boyfriend say now?"
"Ex-boyfriend?"
"Yeah, Brick, well, he's just into some weird stuff," the pig-man says shaking his head, "That's why he built his house out of bricks, seeing as how many creatures he's got after him."
"Oh, I guess I shouldn't have trusted that wolf?" you say apologetically backing slowly down the path.
"You shouldn't go that way," the pig man offers, "Can't you hear the wolf coming toward us from that direction."
"Huh?" you say looking over your shoulder.
"Come on, we'll check on my brother Styx, he's this way. He may have some ideas. If not there's always Bricks," he sighs putting his hand on your arm he leads you up the path.
"Uh, okay, sorry about your house, Mr. Little Pig, sir. Maybe I can-"
"Later, I'll think of some compensation. Oh, and the name is Lancelot."
"Lancelot?"
"Yeah, Lancelot."
A loud howl announces the approach of the wolf. You two start running.