Running to the bathroom, calling out, "I'll be down in a minute," I grabbed my crotch without thinking about it. If I could have seen myself, I would have thought that I looked like my sister or one of her friends when they had to go really bad.
Pulling my pants and underwear down around my ankles, I sat down on the toilet seat and released my bladder. It was only as I was finishing up, that I realized what I was doing. Telling myself over and over, "I am a fifteen year old boy, I pee standing up," I pulled up the panties I'd taken from my sister and then my pants. To keep them on, it took at least six of the holes in the belt.
Rushing downstairs, ignoring my sister, I asked mom, "What's for dinner?"
She handed me a burger and fries from the local burger restaurant. As I ate, my sister finished her meal and disappeared. She returned shortly with a doll and I could feel my mind slipping. Shaking my head, I heard her ask me, "Would you like to play dollies Marcus?"
Putting down my sandwich, I looked at her, forcing myself to focus on the fact that that what she wanted was not normal. Looking at her, I replied, "I have homework to do."
Seeing the hurt look on her face, I hastily grabbed the last bit of my meal and mumbled something like, "Maybe later," and dashed up to my room. Inside, I sat down at the desk and instead of pulling my math book out of my backpack; I instead opened the desk drawer and began looking through it.
"My problems first started around the time that the amulet showed up." I reasoned. But as I looked through the desk, I couldn't find it anywhere.
Closing the drawer, I tried to remember if I placed it anywhere else. My thoughts then turned to the possibility that maybe Katherine took it. Knowing that she knew to keep out of my room, even if she sometimes never listened, I decided to do my math homework instead.
And then I remember something else. There was also the dresses and clothes I had taken from Katherine's room the other evening, "Maybe it has something to do with the clothes," I think as I get up and head for the basement were I left the clothes. In the basement, I find the area were I'd dumped the clothes and was kind of glad mother hadn't thrown the out yet. On top was the dress that I'd last handled.
Picking it up, I felt my mind slip and suddenly I wanted to wear it, but I shook my head instead and focused on the dress. Looking at the tag hanging on it, I realized that the dress was brand new and had never been worn before. Silently I said to myself, "Take it back. Take back these odd feelings and urges. Take it all back and give me back my fifteen year old male body." I repeated this over and over and when nothing happened, I balled the dress up in frustration and tossed it back onto the pile of clothes.
Back in my room, I finished my dinner, threw the wrappers into a pink and white metal trash bin and taking my math book from my backpack, I began to work on homework. An hour later, I slammed the book closed in agitation. In the time that I started, I'd gotten not one problem done. I didn't know why, but for some reason I could not do Junior High level math. Trying to clear my head, I tried some basic addition, but stopped when I realized that I was counting off on my fingers; something I hadn't down since about the third grade.
Bothered by this, I decided to work on the rest of my homework since the math wasn't due until Monday. The only other assignments I had to do was Social Studies, something that was completely lost on me to begin with, and English assignment, also due Monday.
Around nine thirty my mom came in and asked me, "How's it going?"
Setting down my pencil, brushing a strand of brown out of my face, I replied in earnest, "Not very well."
Kissing the top of my head, I suddenly wanted to crawl into her arms and be comforted by her. Shaking my head, I heard say, "It hasn't been easy on any of us lately. But keep your chin up. It will only get better."
Not sure what to say, I instead told her, "I'm kind of tired. I think I'll go to bed early." Something inside wanted me to add ‘Mommy’ to the end of that sentence, but brushed it aside and tried to focus on the here and now; mostly that I was tired and really wanted to go to bed.
Kissing me again, she bid me goodnight and left my room. After she had left, I stripped and looking at the Hello Kitty panties I was wearing, sighed and put on my pajamas before my mind could go on another fantastic journey. Switching off the light, I crawled between the covers and nearly screamed when I found somebody there and it wasn't moving.
Jumping up, I turned on the light and seeing the doll lying on my bed, I huffed in frustration. Taking the doll, I tossed it into my closet, on top of the ballerina costume I had worn earlier that afternoon. Closing the closet, I turned the light back off and climbed back into bed.
Laying in the dark, wondering still what was happening to me, I drifted off to sleep, still having no answers to why my mind sometimes wandered and why I sometimes wanted to do such girlish things.
In the morning, I was woken up by the alarm. Looking at the clock, I realized that I still couldn't read numbers very well. Shaking my head, seeing no improvement, I got up and feeling somewhat clear headed, except for my numeral problem, I dressed in my normal pair of boxers, a pair of pants that where to big, a baggy shirt and pulled on belt to hold up my pants.
Opening the closet to dump my pajamas into the still overflowing hamper, I stopped when I saw that the doll and the costume were missing. Bothered that someone had took them, I threw my clothes into the hamper and told myself, "No one took them. You would have heard someone come into your room if they did. Maybe it was all a dream anyway?"
Looking into the full body mirror, seeing my nine year old body reflected back, I adjusting my belt, grabbed my homework, paused for a moment realizing that I still could do at least the basics in my math, stuffed the assignments and the books into my backpack and raced downstairs to get breakfast; hoping I wouldn't say or do anything weird today. "Maybe I can even get Thomas to talk to me again," I think to myself as I rush out to meet the bus.