Mother comes back in and looking at me, she says in a waspish tone, "You want to dress like a girl Marcus? You want to act like a girl, Marcus? Fine, then you'll put this on, because I'm taking you and your sister out for a nice sit-down family meal.
Apparently my mother can't see that the area between my legs clearly now says that I'm a girl, because she doesn't say anything about it, but instead hands me one of Katherine's nicer dresses, a pair of little girl panties with a picture of Ariel on the front and a pair of my sister's tights; the white ones with the hearts on them. Looking at them, I say to her, "I can't wear these, they're girl clothes."
Mother grins at me and says to me in a sarcastic tone, "Oh, but I thought you wanted to go out in public dressed like a girl? Be treated like a girl? Well since you did that in your own free time, this is the punishment you get for it. Now, get dressed, before I dress you myself."
Wanting to cry, needing to point out the odd things that are happening to me, I pull on the underwear, wishing my mind would take another twist, but it doesn't. Not liking the way the underwear presses into my flattened crotch or the way it makes me look even more like a girl, I whimpered and than pull on the tights. After that, I put on the dress. It's all one piece and the bottom is a navy colour, while the top is a medium blue and has a blue crushed velvet vest sewn in place over it. The sleeves are long with a lace trim around the cuffs, which match the lace that runs around the hemline of the dress.
Looking into the mirror, I see that it's long enough to go all the way down to my feet, which I think is strange since I stand about five foot one now and my sister can't be much taller than three foot two.
As I look in the mirror, my mother comes up behind me and pulling my hair out of the back of the dress, she then fastens the one button in back that is right at the base of my neck.
Next, mother takes me by the hand and mumbling, "Little girls need their hair done," she hauls me into Katherine's room.
My sister is playing on the floor and the moment she sees me, she squeals and says to me, "Marcus, don't you look so cute. Do you want to play dress-up and tea-party?"
Sitting me down on my sister's bed, my mother says to her, "Don't encourage Marcus, princess. Now, get something nice on, because we're going out for a nice sit-down family meal." After that, she begins to braid my hair.
I wouldn't mind this so much, but when Katherine starts to take her clothes off in front of her closet, I point out to mother that maybe she should finish dressing in the bathroom. Mother looks at me and says in that waspish tone of voice, "Why? I got dressed in front of my sister all the time and she did the same in front of me. That's one of the joys of being sisters." After which, she goes back to braiding my hair.
After that, she starts to do my sister's hair up in pigtails. Afterward she hands me a pair of black, sensible shoes that belong to Katherine and tells me to put them on. Putting Katherine and me in the back seat of the car, mother drives us to a nice, family restaurant. On the way, she thinks out loud, "Marcus, what should we call you this evening?"
Katherine squeals out, "Ashley," and mother nods in agreement, commenting that it's is a suitable name.
In the restaurant, I tell mother while were waiting, "I half to pee," noticing the way I'd just told her this, is the same way my sister would sometimes say it.
Mother doesn't seem to notice, instead she takes mine and Katherine's hand and leads us, much to my horror, to the woman's washroom. Inside, she leans down and whispers to me, "Little girls pee sitting down, Ashley."
Not sure that I have a choice, I pick a stall and pulling up my dress, I pull down my tights and panties and than sit down on the toilet. As the urine shoots out of my body from a new location, I marvel at how strange this feels, but also wish to myself that I could have another mind slip. Finishing my business, I wipe, stand up and flush. Pulling up my underwear and tights, I exit the stall to wash my hands.
I want to cry so badly, mostly because mother insists on treating me like a girl and all because she found me dressed in Katherine's clothes. But also because when I want my mind to slip, but it doesn't. Not liking what has happened to me, uncomfortable with the way the panties feel pressed against my now smooth and flat crotch, I eat dinner in silence, not even bothering to ask for dessert. Afterward, mother piles my sister and me back into the car and starts it, but doesn't go anywhere.
More to herself than to Katherine or me, she asks out loud, "Should I punish Marcus some more or maybe enough is enough and that a lesson has been learned?"
The monster that is my sister squeals out loud, "Punish Marcus."
Mother ignores this as she nods and then puts the car into motion and drives us to our next destination; a twenty four hour department store.
Inside, she places Katherine inside the cart and tells me to keep by her side. In the girls section, she selects first a box of pull-ups Dry Nights for a four year old girl and than as an after thought selects one for a three year old girl, muttering to herself, "These should fit Marcus rather well," and then after a minute, also adds a bag of diapers for a three year old and some baby-powder.
Next she puts into the cart several Angelina Ballerina and Hello Kitty pajamas and nightgowns, all for a girl age three. After that, she heads for the toy department and allows Katherine to pick out a toy, another doll.
As we start to leave the toy department, Mother stops at an end-cap and takes a stuffed animal of Angelina Ballerina down and looking at Katherine, mother asks, "Do you think Marcus would like this."
My sister giggles at this and then mother turns to me and asks, "What do you think, Ashley? Is it you? Does it instill a sense of girlish pride in you?"
I'm to embarrassed by all this and keep silent during the whole ordeal. Afterward, Mother checks out and we head home. There, mother takes me into my room, which has not changed, and turning me around so that I am facing the full body mirror, unfastens the button on the dress. Telling me, "Arms up," she pulls the dress off of me and turns me around.
In a serious voice, she asks me, "Do you want to dress yourself or should I dress you myself Marcus."
Tears running down my cheeks, I tell her, "Please don't make me wear that stuff. I'll be good. I'll never wear a single thing of Katherine's again. Please, I don't want to wear any of that stuff."
My mother sighs and looking at me, she says, "I wish that I'd be able to believe you, but I don't think you've learned your lesson. You see, I know it was you now that got into my make-up and not Katherine. I know it was you that went through my clothes and not your sister." With that said, mother takes off the tights and panties I’m wearing and laying me down on my back, pulls a diaper and the baby-powder from one of the bags.
Next she grabs me by the ankles and still not saying anything about the fact that my privates have shifted sex and gender, she slides a diaper under me. Lying me down on it, she spreads my legs and douses my genitalia and butt with a generous portion of the baby-powder. And then I feel the diaper fastened over my privates and mother is standing me up.
From one of the bags, she pulls out an Angelina Ballerina nightgown and taking off the tags, slips it on over my head. Turning me around, she begins to undo my braid and as I stare into the mirror, I breathe a sigh of relief that I haven't transformed any more.
And than I feel myself being picked up and then mother lays down on my bed. She hands me the Angelina Ballerina plush mouse and kissing me on the forehead, tells me, "Sleep like this, and except for being grounded, I think you may have just learned your lesson about wandering around in your sister's and my clothes. Oh, and don't try and take the nightgown and diaper off after I leave."
With this said, she gets up and deposits the dress, tights and underwear into my hamper. Afterward, she clicks off the light and exits into the hallway, leaving my door open.
Laying in the dark, tears of shame running down my face, I ask myself once again, "What the fuck is happening to me. Why have I started to look and act like a little girl?" No answer came, just a feeling like my mind wanted to take another slip as I calmed myself to sleep. And this time I didn't fight it the feeling, but instead just let my fifteen year old self float away.
Comforted by the soft hall light, knowing that mommy was there to protect me, I shifted about, listening to the noise my diaper made as I rolled over and snuggled closer to Angelina. After a bit, I slept; dreaming of princesses, ballerinas and Hello Kitty.