'Well, an 800-number call won't cost me anything,' the guy reasoned, picking up his telephone. A few moments later, a telephone somewhere was ringing. After about 12 rings someone finally answered.
"Hello? How maybe I be of service," a male voice answered, badly faking an Indian accent.
"Um, hello? Is this Spells 'R' Us?" the man asked.
"I am employed by them, yes," replied the voice. "What can I do for you?"
"Well, I seem to have received a package from you--"
"Well, that would be good news, would it not?"
"I didn't order anything from you!"
"Then it is like your Christmas Holiday, is it not?"
"I was supposed to receive a Rolex I paid $50 for!"
"You only paid $50 for a Rolex?! Are you sure it wasn't counterfeit or stolen?! Maybe both!" the voice replied in surprise, losing its "Indian" accent.
"Probably-- wait! That's not the point! I didn't get it-- the watch!"
"Then take it up with the shipping company! They gave you the wrong package!" the voice shot back, irritably.
"No! Wait! I was hoping you could tell just exactly what I got and what I should do with it!" the man pleaded.
"You know, you really shouldn't give people openings like that," the voice advised, sounding amused.
"...?" the man wordlessly replied.
"Never mind. Just exactly what did you get?"
The conversation which followed involved the man describing, in general at first and then in greater detail the pill case and its contents, followed by the letter and number sequence he found on the back of the case (but only after much eyestrain and examination through a magnifying glass.)
"So you are saying that if I take these pills for two weeks, they will gradually grant me a wish, is that it?" the man finally asked, sounding skeptical..., but betraying a certain hopefulness, deep down.
"More or less," the voice on the telephone answered carefully. "Once you start taking them, you must finish off all the pills as instructed, or certain, possibly quite nasty, consequences will follow. If you DO take them as prescribed, then what you think you want to occur, will occur, changing everything to be in agreement with your new reality, although you will remember you current reality. There may be a few others who recall this present reality, but they will be few and far between."
"That sounds too good to be true."
"Well, take them or not-- it is up to you," the voice replied, with a shrug somehow communicated over the telephone lines. "You didn't order them, which means you didn't pay for them. You can take the gamble that they work and swallow 'em, or you can remain stuck as you are and toss them in the trash. Either way, you aren't out any money since you didn't spend any to get them. If that is all, I really do need to go and feed my goldfish now. You know how cranky they get when their supper is late."
Actually, the man had no idea if goldfish even had a concept of time, but decided against saying so.
"Certainly. I will call you back if I have any further questions."
A sign came from the telephone.
"Yes, I imagine you will. Good night."
The line went dead before the man could even open his mouth.
Hanging up the telephone, he stared at the pill case.
The guy he'd talked to HAD to be a complete loon! God only knew what was in those pills! Baking powder? LSD? Aspirin? Reason said he should toss them in the trash or flush them down the toilet!
Yet... suppose they worked? He hadn't spent anything on them. And having everything exactly as he wanted it..., well, that would be a nice switch, wouldn't it? And he could just try taking one pill, just to see if it made him sick or not..., couldn't he? The pills were small, so how likely was it one contained enough to harm him?
What should he do?