The girl started humming the wedding march, and chuckled. "Today's the
big day, gal. We're moving you into the breeding pen with Titus.
He's a championship pig. Won six blue ribbons. After he studs you
three or four litters, we'll probably barbecue him.
"Oink!" squealed Dan stepping backwards a couple of feet.
"Oh, wedding day jitters, I understand, sowie. Titus is one big boar.
In more ways than one, if you get my meaning. Yesterday he did three
other sows, and each time it was wham, bam, thank you ma'am. Now get
over to the gate piggy. It's time to meet your mate," the farm girl
said. As she climbed into the pen to guide Dan, the crow flew into
her face. It clawed at her, and she tripped and banged her head on the
fence post.
"She's dead?" oinked Dan in alarm.
"No," said the crow.
Dan stared at him.
"She's still breathing," the crow continued. I expect she'll be okay
when she comes to. I don't think my little scratches will even scar
her."
"You can speak?"
"So can you?"
"I oink - at least that's - but wait you can understand me?"
"Yeah, I'm under the same type of transformational spell. Common
magical influence allows you to hear me and me to hear you. Or rather
understand each other, if that weren't the case I'd hear grunting and
you'd hear cawing."
"My sister's a witch. Did she do this to you?"
"No, and no. She probably told you she was a witch to make it easier
to scare you and mislead you. You ever watch any original Star Trek
episodes?" The pig nodded. The crow continued, "Remember the one
where aliens made themselves human and created a Halloween Haunted
Castle world? Bones was a zombie, the Enterprise was sealed in an
acrylic block?"
"Uh, sort of. I think it was on video at Rick's Halloween party last
year. The effects were hokey."
"Yeah, well, that one was based on real aliens. I should know I am
one of them."
The crow changed into a naked man in his mid 60's. "Actually, your
sister is one too. I was an intern and I kind of slipped the writer
the ideas. They changed it a bit. See my species can't use our
powers to make us human. We're parasites that need human or other
hosts to live. Uh, remember the movie The Hidden from the 80's. That
was me too. See I'm the cop, or good cop, here to stop and capture,
the being inhabiting Kat. So we both have the ability to occupy
humans, and the technology to change humans into other things. It's
all a game to her. She went rogue over 4 decades ago, and I've been
on her trail ever since. With your help I think I can -" he paused,
"Okay, now what? Why are you staring at me?"
"So my sister isn't a witch. She's a human possessed by an alien
parasite with tech that let's her appear to be a witch? And you're one
too?"
"Yes."
"Uh, can you change me back?"
"That's the plan. First, we need to get you back to my ship."
"You're not going to incinerate her to get the parasite are you?" Dan
asked. He set his teeth. He'd remain a sow forever to keep his sister
from being killed.
"I can't even kill the parasite. I have to bring her back alive," the
man sighed, "I really wasted a lot of time with the movies back then.
I was fascinated with the whole concept. Our world doesn't have
anything even close. Do you recall the film Dark Crystal?"
"Yeah, muppet dungeons and dragons?"
"Sort of. The evil Skekses controlled the world with the Dark Crystal.
They were feathered lizards or scaly birds. Their counterpoint were
the good peaceloving Mystics. They were more like hairy tortoises.
When the crystal was repaired, the shard returned, then the urSkeks
are reformed by the fusing of the Skekses and the Mystics to their
true form. Well, she -the parasite in your sister - is my feminine
side. My evil half if you like. So if she dies, I die. So I have to
capture her."
"Does that mean if you die, she dies?" Dan asked thoughtfully.