"Here you are, boys. Time to put on your school uniforms," Penelope said leading Vinnie into a room with a
single twin bed. She snapped her fingers. Suddenly, Vinnie was naked, and Ryan was standing next to him. He
was naked too.
The both covered the crotches and blushed.
Penelope chuckled. "Your clothing is in the wardrobe. Dress and report to the administration office to get
your class schedule."
Vinnie and Ryan looked at each other with their jaws hanging open. They looked back toward the closing door,
and then to the wardrobe.
"What do we do?" Ryan asked.
Vinnie shrugged, "Get dressed?"
He opened the wardrobe.
They cringed.
They were soon dressed in crushed velvet short pants with suspenders and frilly white shirts, knee socks and
buckled shoes.
"We look ridiculous!" Ryan exclaimed.
"Well, maybe I can change you back into a jockstrap. It would be a lot more comfortable than these Y-fronts
they keep bunching up and giving me a wedgy."
"Loosen your suspenders," Ryan suggested.
"Thanks," said Vinnie.
They stepped out of the dorm room.
"I wonder where the administration office is?"
Instantly a painted wooden sign appeared in front of them with an arrow pointing the way.
The two soon found themselves in an early 20th Century style office with mechanical typewriters, and women in
long dresses behind the counter. There were two other young men seated on a bench dressed identically to Ryan
and Vinnie.
"Ah, the new students!" exclaimed a cracking voice behind them.
They turned to see a teenager dressed in a suit with a pocket watch chain sticking out of his vest.
"Allow me to welcome you," he exclaimed.
Ryan sneered, "How come you don't have to wear the Lord Fauntleroy uniform?"
"Ah, because I'm the principal! Merle N. Magus at your service!" he said extending his hand.
"You're kidding? You cannot be more than 13!"
"Ah, but you're office by a couple thousand years. When I was an old man, I was known as Merlin the Magician.
Hung out with those knights in Camelot. Anyway, one of the good things about living backwards in time, is you
know what happened before it does, because it happened in your past. Problem is you keep getting younger and
you can't be sure exactly on the timeline where you're at. It can be most disconcerting. Why just two years
ago I was shaving, and now I barely have any pubic hairs!" Merle said shaking his head. He grabbed a couple of
index cards out of the air and handed them to Ryan and Vinnie. "Here's your schedule, best get to class."
"Uh, sir, uh, there's a problem. I don't think I should be here."
"Nonsense, Ryan, you and your boyfriend were my best students next year, of course you're supposed to be
here."
"Boyfriend? No!"
"Ryan's not my boyfriend," Vinnie added firmly.
"That's why there's only one bed in our room!" Ryan asked enraged, "You thought we're boyfriends! I'm not
gay!"
"Ah, right, still in the closet - both of you," Merle said knowingly, "Well, I will be ringbearer at your
wedding, so I think I know better. Damn, I'll be only 4 feet tall when I'm ten in four years," he said shaking
his head.
"Ringbearer?"
"Like in the Hobbit or in a wedding?" Ryan asked nervously.
"It's Lord of the Rings and yes, wedding," Merle said with a wink.
"Which one of us is the bride?" Ryan asked nervously.
"You're both grooms?" Merle answered in a confused tone.
Penelope whisked in, "Tch, tch, Merle always forgets himself. You'll get used to his out-of-time comments
after you've been here a while."
"Don't count on it," said one of the women behind the counter, "I've been here 60 years and I'm still not used
to it."
"Sixty years, but you look like you're only 30," Ryan said.
"Thirty!" she said with a huff, "I'm wearing my 22 year old form today! Thirty in deed."
"Dear, it's probably the long dress and your hair in a bun," Penelope said apologetically.
"Well, I suppose," she said in a sad tone.
"Let's see what your first class is, boys," Penelope said grabbing the cards.
"Ah, Black Arts & Crafts! I think you'll enjoy that," Penelope said guiding them out of the office and down
the hall.
"Oh, my. I just remembered," Merle said before the door closed, "Ms. Gulch, please notify the fire department
that they need to be standing by tomorrow at 10 AM. The Alchem lab is going to blow up again."
The door closed.
"We're not taking Alchem are we?" Vinnie asked.
"No, that's for senior students."
"But we're seniors!" Ryan protested.
"No, you're College Freshmen," Penelope explained.
"College? Then why do we have to wear the fruity suits!"
"Ah, well, Merle finds that students tend to relate to him as older if they dress younger than him."
"And if we don't want to wear these outfits," Ryan continued pressing the issue.
"Well, would you rather be Coach Grimmwad's jockstrap?"
"No, I'm Vinnie's jockstrap! I mean, no I don't want to be a jockstrap."
Penelope chuckled.
"Professor Vulpes, here's two new students," she said opening a door into what looked like any school room. It
had fluorescent lights, chalk board and desks.
"Take a seat, gentlemen," said the anthropomorphic fox at the front of the class.
"He's a fox," whispered Ryan to Vinnie.
"That's what Vulpis means," Vinnie whispered back.
"Alright, what spells can you two do?"
"None," said Ryan.
"Nope," Vinnie said shaking his head, "Don't know any spells."
"Sigh! You wouldn't be here unless you two had both done magic."
"Vinnie did it. He changed me into his jockstrap," accused Ryan, then he blushed realizing what he said.
"Ah, inanimate transformation, very impressive. Of course, we all know that is tandem magic. It only works
when two sorcerers cast a spell in concert."
"I didn't do anything!"
"Ah, perhaps not consciously, but then you two will be formidable sorcerers," Vulpes added with a wink. "Now
for our first exercise, we'll do some simple morphs."