Sinse your illiterate, you take this path any way and ignore the signs. You eventually come to what looks like a mansion. And sinse this place is in the middle of no where, you figure it would be safe to break in and steal stuff. And when you kick down the door you are confronted by an extremely obese woman who has to be at least 500lbs and looked like she was in her 40's.
She said, "how dare you break into a witch's house."
"Really? I didn't know that witches could be so fat!" You unwisely responde, sending her into a blind rage and she throws an awsome amount of magical energy at you.