Zack is snoring loudly, when his sleep is interrupted. He feels a sting on his nose.
A voice like a cross between a purr and growl says, "Hey, wake up, Ooogy!"
Zack opens his eyes as a cat- an obviously excited male cat- wearing boots stands in front of him with a
rapier pointed at Zack's nose. Zack leaps up banging his head against the stone ceiling of what appears to be
a miniature castle.
"Huh? Hey, what's going on?" Zack asks nervously. His skin is grey and his clothing is in shreds. He's like
the Incredible Hulk before he turned purple.
"So you're the mighty ogre who can change into anything as big as mountain or as tiny as a mouse. A big galoot
like you could never become a mouse!" he chides.
"Puss-In-Boots?" Zack asks.
"You've heard of me?" he says immodestly flourishing his hat.
"Yes, though the cat who played you in the movie was a tabby not a grey malkin," Zack says.
"Wait they made a play but had my part played by a tabby cat!" he hisses enraged.
"Not a play, 3 or maybe 4 movies. They're like plays captured on canvas, so thousands of people can see the
performance whenever they want."
"Thousands think I'm a tabby!"
"Well, probably millions. The movies came out a few years ago. They're on DVD's now and blue ray."
"M-millions," the cat stammers sitting down in horror and fury.
"Who is responsible for this travesty?"
"Well, I suppose Steven Spielberg is?" you answer groggily wondering if you are still dreaming.
"Steven Sppeelbug?"the cat asks.
Yawning Zack says, "Sumpthin like that. But Mr. Puss In Boots, if I was to demonstrate my ability to change
size, I'd probably change into a germ and infect you."
Instantly, you start to shrink. The room blossoms around you. The cat leaps up to pounce on nothing?
"He turned into dust? What's a germ? A seed?" he studies the floor.
Then he sneezes.
"Oh, my looks like, Mr.Kitty caught me," Zack says.
The cat sniffles, "This is not how the story goes."
"I wonder if I'm just a cold, or maybe feline AIDS?"
"You're my -achoo! C-c-cold?" the cat asks in terror.
"Well, you wanted to catch me for Dick Whittington, right?"
"How did you know that?"
"I read it in a children's book ages ago, I think," Zack says, "But since it's happening now, maybe I read it
in the future."
"A time traveling ogre! I'm so screwed," laments Puss in Boots.
"Hm?" says Zack thinking. The cat is wise to be alarmed.