“Thanks Uncle. Do you know where the Royal Oaf in this town is?” asked Paul.
“My brother raised an idiot!” sighed Uncle Edmund. “That's the only explanation. Boy, how is it you managed to
magically mangle the lives of Timmy and Evelyn without changing yourself into a toad or something? Paulie,
you're so stupid sometimes...”
“Uncle, please!”
“Fine, fine. The lecture can wait. I never should have loaned you that book. Nothing but trouble.”
“The Royal Oaf – where can I find him?”
“If you were anything of a real magic user, you'd be able to sense his presence. He's a bouncer at a bar...
oh, lemme concentrate for a second... the, uh, it's coming to me... the 'Mannerheim'?... no, I got it – the
'Hammertime Bar' on main street. Just down the block from City Hall. Good grief, boy – you should be able to
do this sort of thing yourself by now!”
“Thanks, Uncle. I really do appreciate–”
“Shut up and listen for a moment, boy. I have two piece of advice for you. And from what you've told me about
your prior experiences with magic, you're gonna need this!”
“Okay, what is it?”
“First, when you meet the Royal Oaf: remember he's not what he seems. He is a creature of Morheim. He's not of
this earth. Now, you can defeat him, but you'll have to discover his weakness. So use your head, boy. Use your
wits!”
“I will. Thanks, Uncle. And the second–”
“I'm getting to it! Don't interrupt. Now, after you defeat the Oaf and he opens the gateway to Morheim, you
must remember it's another world – a pocket universe, where Kathellyn Ghulady is god. The normal laws of
physics do not apply. It's another reality. Hell, the normal laws of magic won't even apply! Morheim is her
home turf. It's more than just her demesne. The land, the sky, the water, the very fabric of space-time in
Morheim is the blood and nerves and muscle of Kathellyn Ghulady. Once you enter her realm, you play by her
rules. In Morheim, everything you know is wrong.”
“I'll be careful, Uncle Edmund. Both Eve and I will be...”
“Oh, and one last other thing, Paulie. When you meet Kathellyn, tell her I said hi.”
“You know her, personally? The Dark Queen of Morheim?!”
“A long time ago, Paulie. We were... just acquaintances. Nothing more than that. Certainly nothing that would
enable me to pull strings for you with her. But I'll reckon she remembers me. Kath always had a sharp memory.
So anyhow, good luck to you and your bride, Paulie. You kids have fun storming the castle!”
What next?