"Now which of you wishes to face the mighty Lady Cecilia and her noble steed Stitches!" The clown knight laughed atop the goofy costume horse, its plastic googly eyes looking in opposite directions.
"Yo! I'll fight you," Maedel said casually.
I grabbed Maedels shoulders and said "What are you doing? She just beat a powerful sorceress or witch or whatever she was!"
"Don't worry, I know what I'm doing and it should be fun, right Lady Sissy?" Maedel shouted at the clown knight, "I know I'll be laughing once I kick your ass!"
"This isn't the time to be talking smack, Maedel!" I plead.
"I'll be glad to put a smile on your face permanently, elf maiden. Perhaps we can get you a nice Christmas elf costume once you see the funny side of me beating you!"
"You. Wouldn't. Dare." Maedel grimaces.
"I can already hear your laughter at your own defeat. It sounds like.. Ho ho ho!" Lady Cecilia mocks Maedel and touches a nerve. Santa's elves seem to be a sore spot.
Maedel draws her sword and charges the clown knight, apparently losing her cool.
"Giddyup, Stitches," Cecilia shouts, pulling on her horses reins sharply and charging toward Maedel. She pulls an oversized rubber mallet from the hammerspace behind her back and swings as she passes Maedel. The elf ranger drops to one knee and bends low, skidding past the charging horse. The mallet barely misses her, swinging narrowly past her head. S she passes. Maedel swings her sword up across the pantomime horses midsection. The horse splits in two, revealing it is two clowns in a costume, the back end clown unable to keep up with the front and veers off to the side. Cecilia falls backwards off the front of the horse and lands on her butt. Her mallet dropping down to bop her on the head. She sits there for a moment before slumping over defeated.
"How'd you like that christmas present, biatch!" Maedel says in her most gangsta voice, strutting back to us and pointing forcefully at the defeated clown. It really wasn't very sportsman-like behaviour. but then neither was charging before the duel had begun. As she walked back and Connie and Andrew congratulated her we heard a noise.
"Hyuk hyuk hyuk!" Majique laughed after watching the outcome of the duel, "You may have beaten her but now it's time for Majiques magic show! If this doesn't get you smiling like a clown nothing will. Watch and learn kids!"
The green clad clown pulled a balloon from her ruffled sleeve and began to puff it up to full size. The red balloon quickly expanded and as it got bigger a yellow dot was revealed in the middle. The balloon looked full and ready to pop. Majique stopped puffing and looked around at the dot on the side.
"Oh this simply won't do!" she began puffing again much faster and the balloon expanded to enormous proprotions. The yellow spot stretched amd expanded to reaveal an odd pattern which continued to expand first revealing a yellow arrow, pointing towards where Majique blew into the balloon and then a message "Blow to inflate."
"That's kind of obvious. Right?" Maedel said. I nodded in agreement.
"Don't be so sure! We wouldn't want to make a fool out of you now would we? Oh wait we would! Hyuk hyuk hyuk!" The magician clown laughed, her oversized boobs bouncing up and down as she did. The balloon was enormous now, we'd began to back away as it grew closer to us and dwarfed Majiques cottage. the thing was less than a meter from us now and getting closer.
"We should just try to make a break for it,"
"Oh don't leave! Its time for my big finish!" Majique said, putting the balloon to her mouth one last time before letting go of the nozzle. The air blasted out of the balloon, which quickly went from being a sphere taller than a tree to a pathetic, deflated little thing. at the same time Majique balloned! She grew taller, wider and slightly rounder, growing as tall as the ballon had been. In seconds she'd bloated into a giant towering over us. Her beachball boobs were now bigger than a horse and hung directly over our heads.
"Now for my next trick: How do you make people pancakes?" the giant clowns face loomed over us grinning. "You sit on them!"
The giant spun around and her fat, buttocks dropped toward us like two big round ships bottoms. We wre about to get squashed under a giant butt like it was nothing!