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Princess Sara’s POV
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I stood aboard the deck of our ship, The Gentle Lover, thinking about my journey so far and the effects it had on my friends, particularly Maedel the elf ranger with an adventurers spirit and now a pigs ears and tail. Out of all the transformations she’d experienced it seemed to be the one she disliked the most though I couldn’t understand why, it’s not like she was stuck as a full-blown pig like poor Connie or a brainless monkey like Morgana. I gently sighed “it must be an elf thing.” Still if anything could cure them it would surely be found at our destination.
We had fled to the high seas as an army of clowns swept across my homeland like a strange plague, transforming anyone in its path into colourful buffoons. Our only hope to reverse the changes done to the people of my kingdom was a mysterious prophet, who we believed could be found in the City of Sorcerers that lie across the ocean.
Our journey lasted close to two weeks. After the first three days, my future counterpart (whom we had named Hazel to avoid the confusion of having two Sara’s) was able to return to normal. She had been cursed to turn into a seal when she touched sea water by our mermaid guide Loriel. Loriel ’s curse could only be temporarily abated when Hazel tasted fresh fish which Loriel refused to give her until she balanced a ball on her nose! After many hours of practise (and several meals consisting solely of shrimp and shellfish – ick!) Hazel was rewarded with a juicy fish which restored her to human form… until a great wave splashed across the ship, promptly reverting her back into a seal! It would be another two days before she managed to balance the ball again and be restored once more, after which she decided to spend most of her time below deck! It had occurred to me that I could suggest she try catching her own fish but I quite liked being the only “me” around, especially since my future self was so unladylike.
My brother Andrews’ recent plunge into the cold seas resulted in a fever, or so Maedel said, making it necessary for her to spend more time in his hammock to keep him warm, though I failed to understand why they needed a private cabin below deck! By the time we arrived at the City of Sorcerers Andrew and Maedel had emerged looking rather well if a little bit sweaty and red in the face.
My stepsister Connie sniffed at them with her piggy snout.
“Well, I wonder what you’ve been up to, hmm?” she spoke in a voice that said she knew more than she was letting on.
Maedel put a finger to her lips to shush the Princess turned pig, “If you keep quiet I’ll buy you some truffles in town.”
The pigs face brightened. “I can’t be bought with truffles!” she lied. Maedel raised an eyebrow seeing right through her. Connie couldn’t deny that since she’d been turned into a pig they had become her favourite food. “Well, I suppose I can keep quiet… but it’ll have to be at least a basket full.” She quickly backtracked. It seemed she’d gained a pig’s appetite as well as taste (and stench (Seriously! She smells like a barnyard! (I’m positive I never smelt that bad when I was a pig…)))
Upon our arrival at the docks, Hazel restored the crew of the ship we’d commandeered who had been turned into little rubber balls, save for the Captain who remained a fish in the possession of Loriel the mermaid. I hadn’t actually thought to ask what he’d done to deserve that punishment; however, it might have been very little at all considering how quick she was to curse Hazel and her stubborn refusal to remove said curse.
Before returning to the seas from whence she came, Loriel gifted us with a small conch shell, instructing us to blow on it when we planned to return to my home Kingdom at which time she’d return and help us on our journey though she refused to return Hazel’s “thingamabobs” that turned people into balls.
When we finally departed the ship we decided to ask the harbourmaster where the nearest lodgings were. He was a short man with an exquisitely braided beard that ended with a hoop tied with a bow. He was surprisingly well dressed for a working man, especially for a sailor. His suit looked tailor made and fitted. It was a deep blue tunic with gold trim and eggshell coloured slacks. It seemed most unusual for a man of his standing to be dressed in such finery but it seemed the City of Sorcerers was a most unusual place.
“Hullo there! What brings you to our fine city? Trade and commerce? Do you have a taste for the unusual? Perhaps you’re here to find yourself an exotic pet or to make one!” the harbourmaster pleasantly asked.
“Make one?” Andrew mumbled, slightly confused.
“We just need lodgings for the time being.” Hazel interjected.
“Oh somewhere with a comfortable bed! I’m sick of hammocks! A Princess is simply not built for them.” I said, excited at the prospect of a good nights sleep.
“Somewhere that allows pets!” Connie piped in, not wanting to be sent to the stables again like a common swine. Our other “pet” Morgana the monkey (formerly witch) nodded her agreement though we still weren’t sure just how much she understood with her peanut sized brain.
“Well, you’ll probably be wanting to stay at the Alabaster Palace Hotel and Casino then, Princess.” The harbourmaster said. He was seemingly unfazed by the talking pig we’d brought along with us, “I’m sure it will cater to all your needs, no matter how bizarre.”
We thanked the harbourmaster and went on our way through the pearly port gates and into the city itself. Maedel insisted on wearing the hood of her cloak to hide her pig ears from the moment we left the port. It did a good job of hiding them but anybody with an eye for detail, or admiration of feminine posteriors, would easily have noticed the corkscrew tail that peeked out of a small tear in her short-shorts. It seemed prudent to keep her oblivious to her faux-pas given our financial situation.
We’d left the Kingdom in such a hurry that we hadn’t been able to take much currency with us at all, we simply couldn’t afford to buy her a new pair of shorts. Once again we were heading to our destination with no plan on what to do once we got there. We surely wouldn’t be able to afford to stay at the Alabaster Palace Hotel with the little gold we had.
The Alabaster Palace Hotel, Casino and Bar (they were installing a new sign as we arrived) was a tall building of pearly white marble, seemingly cut from a single slab. It was topped with two enormous peach domes which rose up above any of the nearby buildings. The domes were crowned with silver fountains that sprayed liquid umbrellas high into the air, which then cascaded back down the bulging roof decorations.
A great arch led into the hotel lobby where several greeters in peacock-tailed leotards, that left little to the imagination, waited to welcome their guests. They ranged from tall ebony skinned beauties with pronounced curves to small, alabaster skinned, cuties with boyish figures and everything in between. A number of bellboys stood ready to help with any luggage the patrons might have, their costumes leaving their chests and legs bare. They seemed to be wearing less than greeters. Small and very tight hot pink briefs held the bulges between their legs and their shoulders were adorned with golden epaulettes. Other than matching pink hats they wore nothing at all! They too were as radically different in looks as the greeters. A dark-haired ape of a man stood tall, his muscular chest adorned with a thick and manly mane, his powerful, hair covered arms seemed longer than they ought to be. Beside him stood his polar opposite, a scrawny, feminine runt of the pack, who could easily be mistaken for a girl with his boyish looks. The small protuberance in his briefs looked almost absent compared to the unmistakable hump in his hulking neighbours. His little pink hat sat nestled between to drooping bunny ears making the bellboy look utterly foolish.
“Doesn’t he look adorable?” I gushed at the sight of the effeminate bellboy, “I just want to take him home! When this is all over I’m going to have the West Kingdoms palace full of servant boys just like him!”
“You most certainly will not!” Hazel argued, “And since I am the oldest of the heirs to the West Kingdom what I say goes!”
“That isn’t fair!” Andrew and I cried out.
“You’re only older because you came from the future!” I continued.
“Sorry to break up this little family squabble but what are we going to do now? We can’t afford to stay here with the money we have!” Maedel interjected.
"Welcome! If you are strapped for coin you could try your luck in the casino?" One of the greeters, with an angelic face and green eyes said. She had cyan-colored hair that was tied in a neat ponytail and adorned with lily attached to a headband. As she welcomed us her turquoise peacock tail unfurled behind her, it had an almost hypnotic pattern of eyes. She looked so perfect, like she'd stepped out of a dream. I felt stunned and humbled at her appearance with more than a hint of jealousy. She looked far more worthy of being called a Princess than I!
"If that doesn't take your fancy, I'm sure we could find some work for some fine young country gals such as yourselves!" the peacock tailed girl, said.
The nerve of her! My face reflexively screwed up into a pout at being mistaken for some humble country girl. Then I realized how tattered my dress had gotten, covered in hay and probably smelling of pig. We must have looked very much like commoners with Hazel in her tank top and shorts, Andrew and Maedel in worn out adventuring gear and we were accompanied by a pig and a monkey to top it off! Even the humble city-folk we'd passed were better dressed than us!
"Well, what do you guys think?" Hazel asked, for once she wasn't dictating our next move.