Todd hobbled toward the bouncing remote, muttering "Need to fix this (in Mandarin, no less)." He couldn't move very quickly in his new form, so he just had to hope that the remote wouldn't hit him.
Meanwhile, reality seemed to be completely breaking apart. The librarian-monkey had been multiplied into a troop of winged monkeys, who were currently having an orgy in midair. The blonde had been merged with a chair and the jock had been merged with a lamp. His head glowed on and off like a light bulb as he rode the blonde's dick, which had become part of the cushion. The library itself was breaking into chunks that floated off into the sky, which had become neon green. Carrie was still a statue, but she had been turned into a replica of La Ronda's Saint Ginés de la Jara.
Todd finally got close enough to grab the remote, and he reached out to it with a gnarled hand. His fingers ran across the surface until he found the button he was looking for: the Reset. Todd pressed it without a second thought. The remote shook violently in his hand, as...