Jesse turned his head, catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror across the room. He quickly looked away, the sight of the unfamiliar face staring back still jarring. The reflection didn’t match his mental image of himself, and every time he accidentally saw it, it brought a wave of discomfort that was hard to shake. But something inside him pushed back against that instinct to turn away. If this was who he was now, who he had to be, he needed to confront it, to accept it. He took a deep breath, forcing himself to turn back toward the mirror as he loosened his hair tie, letting his hair fall loose around his shoulders.
He stood there, staring at his reflection, letting the image sink in. The more he looked, the more details he started to notice: the subtle curves of his body, the contours of his face, the way his hair framed his cheeks. It was still surreal, like seeing a stranger's face with pieces of his old self mixed in. His eyes drifted down the length of his reflection, taking in every change, every unfamiliar feature. He’d never had to think about his body like this before, never scrutinized it with such intensity. But now, it was all he could do to try and see this new version of himself as real.
Jesse swallowed hard and walked over to his door, locking it with a quiet click. He didn't want anyone barging in right now, especially not his parents or Sophia. He needed privacy for this, to get used to what had changed. His hands shook slightly as he pulled off his shirt, then slid off his leggings, leaving him standing there in just his thong and bra. He glanced back at the mirror, the cool air prickling his skin, and forced himself to take a step closer.
It felt awkward, standing there almost bare in front of his own reflection, like he was intruding on someone else's life. His instinct was to cover himself, to shy away, but he resisted the urge, instead letting his gaze wander over the unfamiliar lines of his body. His curves were more pronounced, his skin softer, the muscles he was used to seeing now hidden beneath a layer of feminine shape. It made him feel exposed in a way he wasn’t used to, like his body was broadcasting something he didn’t understand yet.
Jesse clenched his jaw, trying to shove the discomfort aside. This was him now. If he kept flinching away from his own reflection, he'd never get past the feeling of being trapped in a stranger’s skin. He placed his hands on his hips, trying to adopt a more confident stance, and looked at himself with determination, as though he could force himself to feel natural about this. The longer he stared, the more the strangeness began to fade. Little by little, his brain started to accept the reflection as part of him. He could almost see the resemblance between the masculine-boy he used to be and the feminine-one staring back.
He ran a hand through his hair, feeling its softness brush against his cheek. It was still weird, still different, but there were glimpses of familiarity there, parts of himself that remained the same. He straightened his posture, rolling his shoulders back, trying to see himself as something more than just a collection of changes. As minutes passed, the sight of his new body started to feel less alien. Not entirely natural, but less like a stranger’s and more like… him. Sort of.
With a steadying breath, Jesse took one last glance at the mirror before turning away, feeling slightly less uneasy than before. He wasn’t completely comfortable yet, but for the first time, it didn’t seem entirely impossible that he could get there. But as he reached for his shirt to put it back on, he paused, turning back toward the mirror.
An embarrassing thought crept into his mind, and despite his efforts to push it away, it lingered. Earlier, he had stumbled upon a folder in his phone’s photo gallery, a folder he hadn’t been prepared to find. The images inside were intensely private, some even explicit, showcasing him in various states of undress and provocative poses.
He had been mortified at the time, quickly closing out of the gallery and attempting to forget what he’d seen. But now, as he stood there in his underwear, the thought gnawed at him. What kind of person had this version of "Jess" been to take such pictures so comfortably? It felt impossible to reconcile that idea with his former self, someone who could barely consider taking a shirtless photo, let alone anything more intimate. Yet the images in that folder told a different story: this version of “Jess” seemed entirely at ease with his body, perhaps even enjoying the chance to show it off.
With a reluctant sigh, he picked up his phone and opened the gallery, scrolling back to the folder. His thumb hovered over the screen as the images appeared in rapid succession with each swipe. Each one made his cheeks flush, a blend of curiosity and discomfort tightening in his chest. Some were nudes, while others were suggestive, featuring lingerie or revealing outfits that accentuated his body in ways Jesse had never considered. There was no mistaking it. These weren’t just casual selfies; they were clearly taken for someone else’s eyes, meant to be shared, meant to entice.
He cringed, a knot forming in his stomach as the next thought hit him. If "Jess" had taken these kinds of photos, then he must have shared them with someone. He knew how it worked in his old world, that girls would often send nudes or flirtatious photos to boys they liked. Now, with the roles reversed, the unsettling thought crept in: he must have been sending those types of photos to girls himself. He hesitated for a moment before opening Snapchat, his thumb hovering over the app icon, unsure if he really wanted to go down this path. But curiosity, mixed with a sense of obligation to understand this new version of himself, pushed him forward.
Jesse opened the app and immediately noticed the private story he recalled spotting earlier, a new one that hadn’t been there in his old life. His pulse quickened as he clicked into the settings of the private story. It’s cryptic title was made up entirely of emojis: "🤫😜😘💞." Only five friends were able to view it, all of them girls, including Tyler. His mind raced, trying to wrap itself around the implications. This wasn’t just some innocent story. It was clearly meant for a specific audience, meant to convey something private, something intimate.
Jesse stared at the screen, feeling like he was at a crossroads. He turned back to the mirror, taking in his reflection once more. He hadn’t expected to be here, standing in front of his own body, contemplating the kind of photos he might take to send to girls. The thought was almost laughable, but here he was. He was about to take a picture, just to see if he could get used to this, if he could become comfortable in his own skin, like the old “Jess” clearly had been. He snapped a few tentative selfies, still feeling self-conscious, but forced himself to keep going. He adjusted his posture, experimenting with different poses, trying to imagine what might actually be considered attractive. His heart pounded in his chest as he looked at the results, each photo feeling like it crossed a line.
He wasn’t even sure what girls would find attractive in a photo like this. Would they be drawn to his breasts? The curve of his hips? Or… he cringed slightly, his eyes drifting to the visible bulge in the thong he was wearing. Was this the kind of thing “Jess” had sent before? It felt awkward, but he kept taking pictures, deleting the worst ones and trying again. Eventually, he captured a shot he didn’t entirely hate. Something about the angle made him look more confident, the expression on his face more relaxed. It was a decent picture, at least.
Jesse’s finger hovered over the screen as he debated what to do next. Posting it to the private story felt like crossing a point of no return. It was one thing to look at the old photos and wonder about this version of himself, but actively adding to that collection, sharing it with people, was something else entirely. His mind raced, heart thudding in his ears as he weighed the decision.
He took a deep breath, staring at the photo on the screen, and against all his instincts, pressed the button to post it to the private story. It felt like time stood still for a moment afterward, his mind buzzing with a mix of fear and exhilaration. What had he just done? He couldn’t believe he’d actually gone through with it. Now there was no taking it back.